100 things to do in 2011: month in review.

it's seriously so messed up that it's almost september. but i'm comforted by the fact that for the first time in my life, the weather is only going to get better from here! though i might have foliage withdrawal. anyways, i actually made some progress towards my 100 things goal this month! i'm only at 23.5 total, but whatevs.

13. see 50 new movies: CONTINUED.

in my first week down here, i popped into a matinee of "crazy. stupid. love." by myself. ryan gosling makes everything better! i'm only at a pathetic total of 10 new movies, btw.

14. dine at 50 new restaurants: CONTINUED.

tried a sushi place near school tonight (kyoto) which was surprisingly good, stuffed my face with pulled pork, mac and cheese and fried pickles last weekend with some new friends at 4 rivers smokehouse in winter park (if any of y'all visit, remind me to take you there), and discovered a new favorite casual lunch spot in a place called crispers.

i'm at 31 new places...i'm totally going to hit 50 by december. right?!

32. try one new recipe a month: CONTINUED.

i've been turning into a domestic diva and it's even freaking me out. i made scallops with angel hair and pancetta a couple weeks ago, and i'm gettin' the fixins for chicken puttanesca tomorrow. who am i?

50. yelp about 10 places i've been: COMPLETED.

i've also been turning into a yelping freak lately, but it's fine. i love to eat so damn much that i don't know why it took me so long to get going with it. if you're on there, friend me!

58. read one book per month: CONTINUED.

finally got around to reading "talking to girls about duran duran" by my writing role model/pop culture guru rob sheffield. great summer read!

59. make my bedroom a cozy sanctuary: COMPLETED.

i guess i had to move to do it, but i feel completely cozy and relaxed in my new room (and place, for that matter). i think it's the all-over carpeting.

69. nurture a plant: COMPLETED.

bought a little palm plant for my patio (read: needs as little nurturing as possible) but i've been watering it occasionally, dammit.

77. eat breakfast daily: COMPLETED.

after not eating breakfast for probably close to 3 years, i vowed to myself i'd turn over a new leaf. thanks to my new weird grad school schedule, i've been uber-successful! i just went through a banana nut crunch phase and i'm kind of over it, though. suggestions?

"is this yours?"

i'm ironically totally removed from the hurricane here in FL (too weird), but all i could think of when i heard the name irene was the chick from real world seattle. fortunately, best week ever is also as cray-cray as me. hunker down and enjoy this slice of reality tv history.

childhood dance routines we'd rather forget.

Following a spirited Twitter conversation last week with Children of the '90s , stand-up comedian/fellow '90s enthusiast/generally funny guy Andy Shaw and I decided to team up for a blog post on bad childhood dance recitals. We know this is a topic that hits close to home for many of you, especially those born and bred during the '80s and '90s. Share your traumatic experiences with us, please. In the meantime, you can follow Andy's musings on Twitter here. Enjoy....and remember, YOU'VE GOT THE POWER!

Kim: Sequined headbands. Hip-hop songs blaring out of a static-laden sound system. Animal-printed, neon lycra. Six year-olds wearing red lipstick. Fathers hoisting camcorders bigger than their heads. While I may have just coincidentally described an episode of “Toddlers and Tiaras”, these things were also part and parcel of a dance recital in the ‘90s. Sure, it all seemed normal at the time, but so did a song by a dude with a mullet called “Achy Breaky Heart”. Why did we – nay, why did our parents – stand for such madness?!

Andy: … Oh, sorry, I was momentarily in a stupor thinking about a child with all of that stuff on. It boggles the mind. Here’s the thing, Kim. We are all guilty of having an embarrassing dance goblin in our childhood closet. We can blame our parents, sure, but they were just doing what everybody else was doing - if we were born 70 years earlier, we’d all have been drowning on the Titanic. But we’re 80s kids, so they sequined and neoned us to within an inch of our godforsaken but totally tubular lives. So it’s no

t a matter of why, I suppose, but how bad?

Kim: Excellent point, Andy. I’ll admit that things got pretty dark, and it wasn’t only because the stage lighting was on the fritz. I hate to harp on the costumes, but I distinctly remember a year when my mother rounded up all of the other moms to sew up an ill-placed, suggestive hole in the center of our tops. You’d think that the designers of children’s apparel would have considered this prior to peddling such slutwear! And then there was the music. It might have had something to do with the particular taste of my gum-snapping, 20-something teachers, but I ended up shakin’ my groove thang to some tunes that were either totally lame, completely inappropriate, or both.

Andy: “Peddling such slutwear” is a phrase to be remembered. I wonder if the dance instructors got a private kick out of the irony of making little kids dance to all that stuff, unaware of what the words mean. Ah, childhood. I can’t wait to make my kid dance to a Katy Perry song.

And now, the evidence...

Kriss Kross: “Jump” (Kim)

In short....wiggity-wiggity-wiggity-WACK. This routine was one of those perfect storms of a one-hit wonder, a low-budget after school program, and a composite of stretchy, black-and-fuschia fabric left over from real dance studios.

Performed at Long Branch Elementary School in Liverpool, New York at the end of my first grade year, we were deluded into thinking that merely enacting the song’s title – repeatedly – and switching lines during the “breakdown” formed a dance routine. But at least we weren’t wearing backwards overalls. Faces are blurred to protect the guilty.

Paul Revere & The Raiders: Indian Reservation (Cherokee People) (Andy)

What’s that? This song is offensive, patronizing, wildly inappropriate, and tries to capitalize on the sorrows of a people nearly wiped off the face of the earth?

You’d be wrong. This song is all of those things, plus a dance number for a group of children! Readers who have checked out my older blog have seen this photo before, but for those who haven’t, well, you’re welcome. It’s not every day you see a little boy in a pink Indian costume excited to dance to an 80’s rock anthem about Native Americans who are “so proud to die.”

That’s right. “So proud to live/So proud to die” the lyrics state, likely something the settlers shouted right before burning villages. Ah, western civilization. The fact the band is “Paul Revere and the Raiders” creates so many jokes, I don’t know where to start.

Janet Jackson: If (Kim)

In case you’ve forgotten about this little gem, here are some choice lyrics:

How many nights I've laid in bed excited over you

I've closed my eyes and thought of us,

A hundred different ways

I've gotten there so many times

I wonder how 'bout you

If I was your girl...

Oh the things I'll do to you

I'd make you call out my name

I'd ask who it belongs to

Clearly, clearly G-rated material that was suitable for seven year-olds to be gyrating and thrusting to. Thank the lord that the lyrics were too breathy and fast for any parents to catch on. Hell, even after dancing to it 50 + times, I don’t think WE caught on. This was also the costume that had the boob-hole. Just family-friendly stuff all around, folks! It’s a miracle we all turned out halfway normal (there was that ONE girl, though...I don’t think she ever fully recovered).

God: Jesus Loves the Little Children (Andy)

Perhaps overlooked in the anthology of childhood dance numbers, we’ve got Bible Camp music. I’ve been to more than my fair share of Bible Camps, so I got get Michael to Row the Boat Ashore, or B-I-B-L-E with the best of them.

Here’s the thing about Bible Camp songs: They all, and I mean ALL, have a series of hand motions with them. No reason, really, other than overly eager parents thinking the message of Jesus can’t be full appreciated without two sets of fingers curled together to signify a heart.

“Jesus Loves the Little Children” is a strange song to teach kids. First off, you’re telling them to identify people by their skin tone - “Look mom, it’s a red one! Like in Cherokee People!” Second off, the underlying premise here is that Jesus loves more than just the other middle class white kids. “Look how culturally sensitive our children are!” On a related reminder note, I went to a lot of Bible Camps.

Sidenote: That video is ultra creepy.

Rob Base & DJ E Z Rock: It Takes Two (Kim)

I really should have learned by this point, age 14, to stop indulging in these ridiculous routines. But the truth was, I did love to dance, and if the price was enduring a painful 3-minute dance for a year of fun combinations and warm-ups, I’d gladly pay it. I’ll never forget my teacher for this one, a nasally club chick who probably hung out at 18+ nights at “Ozone” just over the border in Massachusetts.

There was a lot of booty-shaking, booty-popping, and generally a lot of movements that made me uncomfortable because my trunk had (and still has) absolutely no junk. Our costumes, a crop-top and pants in a shocking neon green, could have triggered epileptic seizures. In this case, two were definitely not enough to make this routine go right.

We know you guys have similar stories (and perhaps even pictures!), so spill them in the comments. May the scarring memories live on!

beef + food trucks = awesome.

since i haven't started school quite yet, i've been in this weird limbo of trying to explore orlando and sitting by the pool and drinking a glass of riesling on my balcony e'rry night, which has been kind of odd because i feel like one of the retirees that everyone up north thinks i'm surrounded by down here (couldn't be falser, btdubs). but anyways, i've uncovered a couple food-related gems here in the past week...come on, don't even act like you're surprised. so, without further ado:

beefy king

desperate to find a replacement for my beloved beef slingers up north (that sounded dirtier than intended), i took a little spin over to the place that locals here in orlando have adored since the 70s. despite the creepy clown decor inside, i kept meat on my mind as i approached the counter. the young man who took my order clearly knew that i was a newbie when i ordered my sandwich with sauce: "oh, there's barbecue sauce over there with the condiments." rookie mistake. nonetheless, a steamed beef sandwich with cheese, pickles, and onions appeared before me as if by magic, and it was quite delightful though not AMAZING. and in true friendly orlando fashion, a random old man came up to ask me if i played keyboard because i had a keyboard on my shirt. i informed him that i did not, and he responded: "why you wearin' that, then?" touche', sir. anyways, i still have a hard time letting go of my old haunts, but i think i can definitely warm up to the BK.

the daily city food truck bazaar

i can get behind any city that holds large gatherings of food trucks. this one, up the road from me in oviedo, was dampened only slightly by the downpour that happened right as the event was starting (picture of the aftermath above)...however, it was still a great time. i was tempted by many trucks, including the one you see below. GATOR! but due to long lines and the fact that i immediately fell in love upon spotting the treehouse truck's "pbj" - a deep-fried peanut butter, banana, nutella and strawberry jam sandwich - it was all over.

quite honestly one of the best things i've ever consumed, and also one of the only things i've ever felt GUILTY about eating...now that's saying somethin'. now, after that little teaser, i'll give y'all what you really want: the foodporn. freaks.

no. words. except "praise tha lord that i worked out earlier."

100 things to do in 2011: month in review (and some other stuff).

oh my godddd how is it august? it's hard to believe that i'm sitting in my new living room in orlando right now, looking at a damn palm tree outside my window. the past 4 days have been hectic and weird, but i'm finally starting to feel a bit more at home now that i have actual furniture (thanks, rooms to go!). i think i'm gonna love it here once i befriend more than the 3 ducks that hang around the pond at my apartment complex 24/7...and yes, i named them isaac, taylor, and zac just because it makes me chuckle. still, i'm having a bit of culture shock.

some things i've noticed about orlando so far:

• everyone is SUPER nice. like, i'm-not-used-to-it-and-it's-almost-creepy nice. literally every individual i have encountered has been overly talkative and helpful. and i mean, a random dude came up to me in bed bath and beyond the other day and asked for help finding his mom a birthday gift. the new englander in me said "run away!" but i knew that i had to embrace this newfound approach. "does she bake?" i shrugged as i pointed at a cake pan. meh!
• i have no allergies here. i seriously would wake up in new england and run for the box of tissues every morning, and i haven't picked up one since i got down here. SCORE!
• the heat is fiiiiine. i've been hanging out on my balcony every night and it's totally effing pleasant. my conclusion? people just love to complain about everything so they exaggerate about everything. or i guess i'm just a sun child, man.
• everything is spread out. i haven't even ventured out of my little corner of the city yet and i'm already a little overwhelmed. but more to explore, i guess!
• i wish i could bring my friends and family down here with me. i miss my buddies a ton already, so they better visit.

anyways, i was pretty much totally consumed with moving this month, but i managed to add two more movies to my list ("no strings attached" which was surprisingly cute and "the back-up plan" which was predictably stupid...but alex o'loughlin oh my oh my). i also had a whirlwind week of goodbye dinners in boston which included sushi at yoki, yummy pizza at pisa pizza, and chicken parm at a townie place in malden. i also discovered a gem of a chain restaurant in pooler, georgia called FATZ en route to orlando, where the manager sat down to chat and was super-nice. i ate some fish called basa which was badass.

wave backwards to massachusetts: a moving mix

i start the 22-hour drive down to my new life in orlando tomorrow morning, so i decided to make a mix to start me out on my journey. and why the heck shouldn't i share it with y'all? random comments on select tracks below. enjoy!

listen: HERE

1. the maine - don't stop now

makes me giddy like a schoolgirl. that riiiiiiff.

2. cobra starship - you make me feel

3. ja rule- always on time

believe me, the pimp game is VERY religious.

4. morningwood - best of me

if music ACTUALLY played during my life, this would be perfect for a "screw you" romantic or job-quitting scene.

5. hallelujah the hills - wave backwards to massachusetts

had to include this because it's SO apropos.

6. metric - combat baby

7. black kids - look at me when i rock wichoo

fun lil' ditty about a girl who won't give it up before marriage. hilar!

8. alien ant farm - glow

that "smooth criminal" cover totally ruined this band's street cred, but my friend totally changed my mind about them when she sent me this song in high school.

9. nappy roots - roun' the globe

really, really makes me want to have a glass of purple juice for breakfast.

10. arkells - pullin' punches

11. panic at the disco - that green gentleman

a total 180 from their debut stuff, i don't even think you'd recognize these former pop-punkers aside from brandon urie's kinda distinctive voice.

12. phantom planet - dropped

sooooo catchy.

13. rooney - stay away

sooooo summer.

14. ben kweller - penny on the train track

15. cheap girls - ft. lauderdale

16. eve 6 - rescue

from one of my all-time favorite albums (shut up, i'm serious), this song also has some of the best and subtly dirty lyrics ever: "i professed my love in an animalistic manner, like an endless foreign flick....my subtitles were sick." yah, brah.

17. the ordinary boys - week in week out

18. dj khaled f/ drake, rick ross & lil' wayne - i'm on one

i found out the other day, thanks to some kind twitter friends, that "i'm on one" means "i'm high" or "i'm on drugs". WHITE GIRL PROBLEMS!

19. the parlor mob - can't keep no good boy down

20. lucky boys confusion - hey driver

hey girl...an apple a day won't keep me away.

seriously, could ryan gosling be any more adorable/sexy/flawless etc.? this latest press tour for "crazy stupid love" has just sent me right over the top. the below video was from a lil' while back, but it introduced me to this HILARIOUS blog, fuck yeah! ryan gosling, which features him in hilarious and/or hot photos with ridiculous captions that start with "hey girl". the fact that he thinks this is hilarious makes me love him even more. le sigh.

seriously...IT'S LIKE HE'S PHOTOSHOPPED.

on moving

i’m starting to get used to this.

as i prepare for my 4th move in 5 years, i’m becoming accustomed to the routine: crave a change, find a new place, sell my already inexpensive IKEA furniture for less than i paid for it, start all over, repeat. at 25, while many of my peers are planning weddings and settling down in the suburbs, i feel anything but settled. but for me, i wouldn’t have it any other way.

i saw a segment on the today show recently about two best friends who were separated when one moved to new york city in her 20s. still back in california and attempting to entice her to return after she was heartbroken by a boy, her friend sent her a postcard that read in part, “life is a romantic adventure”. to me, there are few phrases that ring truer. change is scary, yes, but also invigorating. it shakes you up, forces you to dig deep down to begin anew and learn new things about yourself. some might mistake the desire for change as stemming from unhappiness, but nothing could be further from the truth in my experience. i’ll always have an incredible fondness for boston and the time i’ve had here. the people I’ve met, the amazing culture and history, the fantastic restaurants and gorgeous summer days spent strolling through the city. yet, i know that the time has come for me to explore new streets, find new go-to sushi and pizza places, and quite simply, experience another way of life.

sure, I’m trading in crisp new england air for sometimes stifling humidity, a historic victorian home with tons of character for a sleek modern apartment, and vibrant fall foliage for insects of all shapes, sizes, and colors. but, in my estimation, i’m also getting palm trees instead of sneeze-inducing pines, sun-drenched winter days that might have otherwise been spent shoveling snow up north, and dinners al fresco in the middle of the winter. who’s to say what’s better, really? it’s just different. and until i experience that difference for myself, i’ll be left not knowing which I prefer. as far as I’m concerned, that freedom to explore is the best part of being in my 20s.

i’m all about putting down roots...somewhere, someday. but for now, i’m quite content being a tumbleweed.

100 things to do in 2011: month in review.

holy crap, i just realized it's almost july. as such, i need to keep track of what i did this month...not too shabby overall!

13. see 50 new movies - CONTINUED.

my lovely friend and bride-to-be took us future bridesmaids to see the movie of the same name, which was HILARIOUS. seriously, if you haven't seen it...get on that. i also watched the creepy but totally hot and engaging indie flick "daydream nation" which stars kat dennings as a bored teenager who seduces her classmate AND sexy teacher (played by sexy josh lucas). definitely worth a watch!

14. dine at 50 new restaurants - CONTINUED.

i'm not counting the 20+ restaurants i had food from at taste of cambridge because that would just be cheating (i just realized i gave new meaning to the phrase "eatin' ain't cheatin'"...ANYWAYS i digress). i had fun family brunch at the windmill diner in connecticut (best greasy spoon EVAH), consumed burgers and beer at deep ellum in allston, greasy pub food at the townie dockside in malden, and....i think that's it. if you've been keeping up with me this year, i've only been to 14 new places. i gotta speed it up if i wanna hit 50.

32. try one new recipe a month - CONTINUED.

i made "easy parmesan-garlic chicken" from the kraft website. which was aaactually super easy. who knew? yes, i've been slacking on this one and still need to make 10 other dishes to catch up, but i'm trying, guys.

42. learn the single ladies dance - STARTED.

i got frustrated after about 20 minutes but i'm slowly starting to get the hang of it. p.s. i'm using this tutorial which is effing fierce.

55. eat at pinkberry - COMPLETED.

GAHHH i love froyo with strawberries and granola.

61. make $1,000 in freelance - COMPLETED.

my $120 haul from this month brought me up to $1,005 total. cha-chiiing.

62. tone my stomach - STARTED.

i've been doing 100 crunches a day for about a month now. i'm feeling the burn, man.

70. go to a farmer's market - COMPLETED.

went to the aforementioned sowa open market a few weekends ago...and left with no produce and a painting. it's fine.

fewd, dewd

i've literally eaten the best food ever over the past couple of weeks and i obviously needed to talk about it with all of you.

• my pal james runs the roxy's gourmet grilled cheese truck here in boston, and they're going to be featured on the food network's great food truck race in august! i finally got to sample the delicious GC at the sowa open market in boston's south end. sandwiches include a wild mushroom confit-and-swiss creation and another with port salut cheese, candied walnuts and cherry compote...for real, for real. i went classic (and local) with "the green muenster", which included guacamole and applewood smoked bacon. ohhhhyeahhh. literally, best grilled cheese you'll have in yo' life.

• i also attended the phantom gourmet bbq beach party on sunday and delighted in rib, brisket, and pulled pork sandwiches from australia, texas, and virginia, respectively. the winner? texas thunder's brisket. still dreaming about it.

• em (my cupcake crawl partner in crime) and i went "taste of cambridge" last night, where over 50 restaurants set up shop in harvard square to feed us lil' piggies. it's all a blur, but among the things i ate were: deviled eggs with baby shrimp, rice krispie treats, bacon cotton candy(!!), pork bahn-mi, a pb&j cookie thing, 5-spice chicken satay, cod and lobster chowder, gazpacho/beef carpaccio/strawberry macaroon (pictured above), salad, vegan lime tart, crispy duck tacos, oreo ice cream, summer veggie maki, clam ceviche, meatloaf slider....are you puking yet? honestly don't know how i didn't. as emily said, "this is the best event of my life, aside from my wedding".

bottles & models: summer 2011 mix

in keeping with the trend of seasonal mixes, i got inspired by the beautiful weather we've finally been having in boston and decided to make a whimsical mix that's perfect for driving around during summer days and nights, too. also, it's sunday and i just had a fun day in the sun, so i'm not really in any mood to describe EACH AND EVERY track, but trust that it's killahhhh, kids. enjoy!

listen...HERE!

track listing:

1. washington social club - breaking the dawn

2. superchunk - here's where the strings come in

3. art brut - people in love

4. the young veins - young veins (die tonight)

5. the joy formidable - whirring

6. mazes - most days

7. nikka costa - everybody got their something

8. the cab - i'll run

9. phantom planet - leave yourself for somebody else

10. allen anthony - alright

11. the new pornographers - july jones

12. amerie - why don't we fall in love

13. two hours traffic - better sorry than safe

14. jagged edge f/ nelly - where the party at

15. the pack a.d. - deer

16. hanson - tearing it down

17. someone still loves you boris yeltsin - glue girls

18. the jesus & mary chain - stardust remedy

19. REM - supernatural superserious

20. damone - carwash romance

N-K-O-T-B-S-B...baby.

last night, i had the fortune of attending one of the most epic events of this year in boston, and one of the most epic events of all time to occur at famed fenway park. yes, folks, i'm talking about the union of boy bands new kids on the block and backstreet boys. in fact, it was fittingly ironic after i got this article published in thought catalog this past week about things i should stop doing now that i'm 25. but WHATEVER. plenty of awesome people-watching: cougars on the prowl, lots of north shore hairdressers, and one fine-ass nick carter. all in all, AMAZING.

highlights:

- all of the group members being introduced as a "starting lineup" and running out onto the field in red sox jerseys

-boston mayor tom "mumbles" menino declaring june 11 "NKOTBSB day" hahaha

- joey mcintyre crying during "please don't go girl"

- torrential downpours halfway through the show and no one caring (joey mac: "it's rainin' at fenway and we don't give a shiiiit!")

- nick carter almost biting it onstage because of the rain/looking amazing

- a finale of their hybrid song "don't turn all the lights down" while wearing bruins jerseys

- an encore of "hangin' tough" from the green monster while wearing celtics and orlando magic jerseys (i didn't catch these last two because my camera died...COOL).

THINGS I WILL MISS ABOUT NEW ENGLAND.

welp, the word is out!

i'm moving to the land of boy bands, mickey mouse and the magic at the end of july - sunny orlando, florida - to attend grad school.

while i'm wicked excited for getting down in o-town, there are some choice things i will miss about the NE. in no particular order...

matty in the morning

i LMAO just about every morning to this snarky, cynical man and his sidekicks, billy and lisa. my friends and talk about them as if we know them personally. matty completely crushes listeners' and billy's self-esteem on a regular basis and it's fantastic. i only hope i can stream that ish in FL.

liberty bell roast beef & seafood/roast beef roundup

while working in woburn (or "the woob", as we affectionately called it), my coworkers introduced me to the gem that is roast beef roundup, or "guns and beef" - a hole in the wall where ordering is meant to be slightly frightening and the decor is more shoot-em-up than stylish. best damn beef i've ever had in my life. but when our office moved north, i needed my fix without the drive. enter liberty bell. just about a mile from my house, and just as good as the ol' RBR.

i also got word that the roundup is closing in august, so i guess good things never last...siiiigh.

phantom gourmet

the andelman bros are some funny men. for y'all non-new englanders, they host and produce a weekly TV and radio show called phantom gourmet. the TV show highlights yummy new england eateries every weekend morning and is basically total food porn for a freak like me. they also host local food events, and at the food and wine phest last year, i went up to dan andelman and asked for a picture. as we're posing, he goes "this is my girl, @kimlw! i retweeted you this morning...no shit!" I. DIE.

downtown melrose, ma

before i saw my current apartment, i had never even heard of this town. but i've totally fallen in love with the damn place. the old victorian houses are stunning. it's hokey, but walking down main street quite literally feels like a storybook. i can walk from my adorable lil' place to dunkin' donuts, a bunch of great restaurants, starbucks, like 4 different independent bakeries, CVS, the grocery store, my hair salon, a relaxing pond, etc. etc. and, i'm only a 15-minute t ride from boston! i guess i'm a 'burbs girl after all. and while it's time for a new chapter in the sunshine state, i would come back to melrose someday in a heartbeat. in the summer, that is.

foliage

meh, i'll miss me some red and orange leaves. i guess.

newbury street

classic boston. i've had many a magazine-reading brunch at trident booksellers, summer night ice creams at JP licks, and window-shopping seshes at marc jacobs and fcuk. loves itttt.