Saturday, December 27, 2014

my 2015 to-do list




as i began to draft my annual list of things to do, i realized that i'm headed into my 29th year. STOP THE WORLD,  I WANT TO GET OFF. jk, i'm (sort of) cool with it. but i had to dig deep into my 30 before 30 list this time around, considering that i've only completed 7ish of the items on it thus far. there are a couple repeats from years past on here -- can someone please crash a wedding with me?! -- but i'm feeling confident that i can make most of these happen.

what do you want to accomplish in the new year?

1. learn to parallel park
2. secure a book deal
3. go skinny-dipping
4. get my cheeseburger tattoo
5. see the grand canyon
6. kiss in the rain
7. go zip lining
8. meet dave grohl (ok, i'll settle for any famous musician ... but bonus points for dave grohl)
9. do something in vegas that stays in vegas
10.strike up a conversation with a stranger on public transportation
11. go to the zoo
12. pose for a photo in front of tom's restaurant in NYC
13. read i wear the black hat by chuck klosterman
14. start a daily journal
15. [keeping this one to myself]
16. cook dinner for someone
17. attend a celtics game
18. make a fancy cocktail for myself
19. go climbing at brooklyn boulders in somerville
20. have a happy & fulfilling romantic relationship with a grown-ass, emotionally available man
21. ride a rollercoaster
22. dine at the top of the hub
23. buy a home (let's try this again ...)
24. bake one of each of the following: a bread, a cake, a pie, a pastry, and a cookie
25. see a drive-in movie (can you believe i've never been?!)
26. leave a lucky penny for someone to find
27. see a band that i love for the first time in concert
28. book the trip to london/paris/amsterdam that i've been dreaming about for 3 years
29.order a whiskey flight at citizen public & oyster house
30. get ice cream delivery from scoopsies
31. do a "cleanse" (maybe after the ice cream delivery?)
32. relax in a hot tub
33. visit an island
34. begin a collection (i'm thinking souvenir mugs)
35. buy a meal for a homeless person
36. read a famous memoir
37. submit something that i wrote to an anthology
38. go pear-picking
39. make cold-brewed coffee
40. go to a strip club
41. crash a wedding
42. send a snail-mail letter
43. take a class for fun
44. get a tarot reading at the tremont tea room
45. see a movie and then read the book it was based on
46. complete the new york times sunday crossword in one hour or less
47. hang out in a tree house
48. play blackjack
49. attend a dance performance
50.meet someone from twitter in person

Saturday, December 6, 2014

my top 14 songs of 2014!


it's that time again! i usually wait until a bit later in the month, but i got inspired a couple of weeks ago and just had to make my list immediately. i also usually count down instead of up, but let's get to the good stuff right away, shall we? handy-dandy spotify playlist (minus taylor swift, that drama queen) HERE.

what were your favorite songs this year?

1. bear hands - "giants"


i had a hard time choosing just one track from bear hands' excellent album distraction, but this tune won out and rose to the top for me due to the combination of frontman dylan rau's delightfully erratic delivery, a super-breezy chorus, and a reference to the late, great rapper ODB. though i'm still not sure what he "got right from the start."

2. bad suns - "transpose"



full disclosure that this one has a bit of sentimental value for me, because i completely associate it with my february trip to new orleans. but it's so good! and so catchy! i don't really know what else to say except that it's just a killer indie pop song.

3. catfish & the bottlemen - "kathleen"



i've talked about these guys a bunch this year even though i absolutely despise their name. yet, i can't deny that they make great music. just try and resist shouting along as van mccann (his real name) is all "i gotta give it to you, you give me problems!" perfect soundtrack for road rage and/or a toxic relationship. this live performance makes me chuckle because of van mccann's accent.

4. freedom fry - "the wilder mile"



more people need to hear this! it's understated, beautiful, and a little melancholy. plus, best band name ever? behind diarrhea planet, that is.

5. trey songz f/ nicki minaj - "touchin', lovin'" 


mr songz's (?) entire album trigga was a favorite for me this year, but upon my first listen, i immediately identified this song as the standout. mainly because it made me go "dayum, did he just really say that?!" the first few times i listened. and also because it made me dance in my car at least 30 times.

i recommended it to a guy i was dating over the summer when i was really obsessed with it, and his response was a stunned "this is sooo raunchy. why do you like it?" then i felt like a perv and immediately was all like, "uhhh, i just really love the beat!" (which, i mean, i do). also, i'm no longer dating that guy, so i can now openly profess my love for trey songz and his explicit r&b jams without fear of prejudice and judgment.

6. heathers - "circular road"



they're like the irish tegan and sara! if i based this list on choruses alone, i think this would take the crown.

7. the orwells - "southern comfort"



the lyrics to this song just contain so much practical wisdom. it's like a rock 'n roll how-to guide, performed by 12 year-olds (okay, they're like 20). come on: "life is better with a handful of ass, badass shades, and a bag full of grass"? pure poetry.

8. iggy azalea f/ charli xcx - "fancy"



sorry, had to. but you can't deny that no matter how much you hear this, you will instinctively say "first things first, i'm tha realest" in your most gangsta voice every. single. time. or maybe that's just me. bonus points for the video that riffs on clueless, too.

9. cathedrals - "harlem"



soooooo chill. go lay in the grass somewhere, close your eyes, and listen.

10. curtis harding - "surf"



definitely the best song i will ever shazam in a forever 21. and imagine my excitement to find out he's on my favorite label, burger records! a little bit funk, a little bit soul, a little bit rock and roll. dig it.

11. the knocks f/ powers - "classic"



a total summer jam that is perfect for any time of year. it makes me think of the beach and frolicking and flirting and being carefree and basically everything good and fun in life.

12. taylor swift - "blank space"



say what you want about t-swift, but the bitch can write a hell of a pop song. the obvious choice would be "shake it off," but i gravitate towards "blank space" because it's adorably self-deprecating and a lil' quirky. however, i will continue to sing "gotta love those starbucks lovers" instead of "got a long list of ex-lovers" because it sounds like starbucks, dammit.

13. courtney barnett - "avant gardener"



speaking of quirky, ms. barnett has cornered the market when it comes to clever, oddball lyrics. my favorite? "the paramedic thinks i'm clever 'cause i play guitar/i think she's clever 'cause she stops people dyin'." oh, courtney!

14. kid ink f/ chris brown - "show me"


never thought one of my favorite songs of 2014 would include the word "panties," but i guess i shouldn't be surprised after #5. see, i can safely hate chris brown and acknowledge that he's a terrible human being ... unless he's singing, or  dancing, or crooning that he's going to give me what i neeeeeed, yeaaaaah. then it's like:











YES I WILL SHOW YOU EVERYTHING, CHRIS BROWN. 
also, the beat just makes me wanna groove.

Saturday, November 22, 2014

super-cliche thanksgiving post: what are you grateful for?



i know, i know. it's rare to see me going all "attitude of gratitude" and #blessed and deepak chopra (but real talk: i've been doing his daily meditation series with oprah and it's phenom). 

however, it seems only appropriate that i think about some of the things in my life that i appreciate the most in preparation for the upcoming turkeyfest next week. how about y'all?

  • my health. after a couple of harrowing experiences in my past (a freak monster cyst in college and emergency gallbladder surgery just two years ago), i was terrified to have my routine physical about a month ago. but everything looks fab! totally worth a happy dance, and something i've learned not to take for granted. 
  • COFFEE. yeah, it tastes like heaven, but i realized that the ritual of stumbling out of bed and over to my single-serve brewer brings me such great joy each morning. give me a full mug, a full RSS feed, and my sun-filled living room, and i'mma be alright.
  • my family. a bunch of my aunts, uncles, and cousins got together for a mini-reunion a few weeks back, and it really helped bring me out of my head and into the moment. we made dinner together and watched scary movies and competed against each other in darts, trivia, and ping pong. sounds sappy, but it was just what i needed that weekend.
  • really good songs. it always amazes me that even when i'm in the best of moods, a really poignant song can make me cry. or when i'm in the worst of moods, a really upbeat song can make me smile. like, when i went to see the new pornographers live this week, all i wanted to hear was their song "bones of an idol" because it's beautiful and grand and epic. and they played it! i may have teared up a little bit.
  • my friends. while a couple of my gal pals are married with kids now, we've established a tradition of monthly girls' nights where we all get together and eat and drink too much and gossip and analyze texts and it's basically like sex and the city without the louboutins and cougars. hos before bros, man. always.
  • traveling. it doesn't even have to be far, but just a day trip to explore a place i've never been gives me a whole new lease on life and recharges the ol' batteries sometimes. i've been really fortunate to get to see a whole bunch of cool places in my 28 years, and can't wait to see even more.

Tuesday, November 4, 2014

celebs i want to party with

these folks just look like they're a good time. i would love to close down the bar and/or sing karaoke and/or have silly drunk conversations with the following individuals. how about you?

matthew mcconaughey

















this one's a given, because who DOESN'T want to get weird with this man? though i'd probably make him imitate wooderson the whole night. "there's a new fiesta in the making as we speak."

jenny slate





















she's a mass native, and she's also hilarious. can't go wrong!

jason segel





















just seems like a really laid-back, nice dude. and he'd make me laugh and laugh and laugh.

ke$ha





















i've always said that if i was a pop star, i'd probably end up being a mix between lady gaga and ke$ha. she's sooooo weird, meaning that any time spent with her would probably result in an epic story.

blake anderson





















my favorite workaholics cast member. when i first saw him on conan one night, discussing how he broke his spine when he jumped off a roof at a party, i was all about it.

Sunday, October 12, 2014

5 things i love right now

1. this song by catfish & the bottlemen, "26"



saw these guys live last weekend, and they put on a really high-energy, tight show. couldn't understand a word of the lead singer's stage banter due to his thick welsh accent, but that was my problem and he was cute as a button, so it was fine. i love that all of their songs have super catchy melodies, but still have that raw power and a bit of an edge to them. halfway through the first verse of this tune from their forthcoming album, i had one of those "I LOVE THIS SONG" concert moments and immediately went to find it when i got home. LOL at the artwork, tho.


2.  ARE YOU AFRAID OF THE DARK ON YOUTUBE

'nuff said. my favorite episode is "the tale of the whispering walls." still scares the crap out of me. what's yours?

3. goldenrod cardigans



in late august, i had a dream that it was fall and i was wearing a cardigan much like this one. when i woke up, i realized that i didn't own one and was deeply unhappy. i'm pleased to say that i purchased one the following week and have been wearing the hell out of it ever since. throw on a scarf with one of these babies and it does NOT get more autumn, unless you have a candy apple in your hand. which i highly recommend as well.


4. rediscovering rock of ages


did you hear about the guy that saw the musical rock of ages 500 times? first, i was confused as to why it was even a news item, since i feel like there are muuuuch stranger things that people have done 500 times. second, i was reminded of the first time i saw the glorious show (it's ok, i've only seen it twice) and promptly went on a youtube binge. keep in mind that i detest most musicals -- at least, the showtune-y ones -- so a song-and-dance show full of hair band covers and crude humor promptly shattered all stereotypes for me. i will never, EVER see the god-awful-looking movie with tom cruise. but if this number doesn't make you wanna, um, rock/quit your job and audition for a broadway musical, i'll be damned. 



simultaneously beautiful and soooooooo cute!




Sunday, September 28, 2014

my 2014 to-do list: 8-month update


totally meant to do this like, in july, but oh well. umm ... it's almost the end of the year now, and i've only completed 13 (that's 32.5%) of my 40-item list. granted, some of them were pretty big items, but i just can't finish out 2014 with less than 50%. it's unacceptable.

here are the ones i've accomplished so far:

2. visit new orleans


6. finish my book proposal

it only took 2+ years! currently querying agents far and wide.

9. visit somewhere that's haunted

everything in new orleans is haunted, so ...

10. color my hair

decided on some red balayage highlights a few weeks ago, and i'm pretty happy with how they came out.




12. dine at 5 restaurants on the eater boston 38.

jm curley, hungry mother, highland kitchen, ten tables, and bergamot. boom!

14. watch a whole tv series that i've never seen before

watched all of HBO's "silicon valley" in a weekend.

15. take the jeopardy online test

this was like 6 months ago, so i doubt i made the cut.

19. do volunteer work

it took me a second to remember what i did, because it wasn't for charity or anything. i made grilled cheese sandwiches with roxy's grilled cheese at the boston calling music festival!

20. visit martha's vineyard


21. drink a "green smoothie"

only slightly ashamed to say that i've now had more than one. like, at least a handful in recent months. they just taste like juice!

23. write to a celebrity and receive a response (online or snail mail)

i think there was another twitter-related exchange that i can't remember, but i do know that i've been retweeted by both andrew wk and ludacris this year! woo.

28. buy a plant for my apartment (and don't kill it)

ok, so the flowers are gone, but the leaves are healthy as ever! it counts.

30. reconnect with an old friend or acquaintance

i got back in touch with my old coworker, kathleen, who actually helped me conquer most of the eater boston 38 restaurants.


here are the remaining items that i think i can knock off:

4. take a cooking class
7. learn enough french to get around (being optimistic here)
11. get business cards
13. make a collage
22. overcome my eyelash-curling phobia
24. see a non-musical play
25. say "yes" to something i want to say "no" to at first
26. make my own sushi
29. participate in a scavenger hunt
31. teach myself a dance routine via youtube tutorial
33. pack a picnic lunch and eat it on boston common
34. win at pub trivia (2nd place finish twice ... come on!)
35. go to an ice bar
36. make my own pizza
37. win money from a slot machine or scratch ticket
38. send christmas cards
39. go out to dinner by myself

...and these ones will be a stretch, pending some miracles and/or assistance and/or intense effort:

1. purchase a home
3. be in a music video
5. swim in an infinity pool
16. try air bnb
17. get something i wrote published on mcsweeney's
18. go to a state fair
27. crash a wedding 
32. go sailing (or at least, on a sailboat)
40. watch 5 movies on the IMDB top 250 that i've never seen before

help, guys! 

Thursday, September 18, 2014

"anybody order a loveburger, well done?"

it's national cheeseburger day, and i love me some cheeseburgers. let's celebrate with a smattering of the best burger-related things on the internet.


this insane(ly awesome) sweatshirt.



this pimped-out ride with all the fixins.


this classic film.



this delightfully weird print.


this beefy bling.



Tuesday, September 9, 2014

11 things you didn't know about me (maybe): liebster award nomination


haven't done a survey like this in a dog's age! the lovely marg b. of sugarskull industries nominated me for this neat liebster award thang, which helps readers discover new blogs. i've answered 11 questions that she had for me, revealed 11 facts about myself, and then asked 11 questions of two of my favorite bloggers. fun!

11 questions from marg b.


1. Favorite ice cream flavor?

mint chocolate chip.

2.  Do you mostly sleep on your side, your back, your stomach, or do you rotate all around?

stomach, with a lil' bit of side mixed in.

3.  What is your favorite thing about Fall?
PUMPKIN SPICE LATTES!! jk, they're nasty. can "boots and scarves" count as one thing? also, hot cider. sorry, i'm doing this wrong.

4.  What is the last movie you saw?
if i stay. i cried and cried and cried. so much that at one point, my mom told me, "you need to stop" and i think it triggered a migraine. good movie though.

5.  Where is the farthest you've traveled so far?
rome, italy.

6.  Are you crafty?  If so, what do you like to do? If not, what would you like to be able to do?

hell naw. i wish! i'd love to be able to knit or crochet, so i can make massive doilies and stuff.

7.  Any pets?  Any pet you'd like to have someday?

nope. definitely want to have an american eskimo someday, though:



8.  What tv shows are you watching right now?
umm, i watched the entire first season of silicon valley this past weekend ... super funny. if it can make me laugh out loud, i'm typically a fan. 

9.  Pick your poison; wine, beer, spirits, or tea?
i'm an equal opportunity drinker, but whiskey cocktails are my favorite.

10.  Favorite thing to do to recharge?
take a vacation! or even just a day trip.

11.  Favorite spot in your home or apartment?

definitely my living room:
















11 facts about me


1. my favorite song of all time is "waterloo sunset" by the kinks (followed closely by "freedom '90" by george michael).


2.  i'm adopted, so even though i grew up as an only child, i have nine biological half-siblings!


3. my biggest pet peeves: when someone doesn't say "thank you" when you hold the door for them, and when someone tries to make something more complicated than it is.


4. believe it or not, i've never seen harry potter, lord of the rings, the hunger games, twilight, or any of the star wars movies besides the original (which i went to see when they re-released it in 1997, and i fell asleep in the theater). i'm okay with it.


5.  i'd estimate that i've seen close to 200 bands live. the tinnitus in my left ear can vouch for this.


6. meat is awesome, but i could totally be a pescetarian if i had to. salmon, tuna, crab, lobster, shrimp ... love it all.


7. my middle name is louise, my great-grandmother's name. i used to hate it, but i think it kinda suits me.


8. i once interrupted story time in elementary school to ask if it was lunchtime yet.


9. i totally believe in the law of attraction/"the secret" -- basically that like attracts like. and someone on TV just said "secret" as i typed "secret." #proof


10. my idea of happiness is sitting with a cup of coffee, a crossword puzzle, and a great playlist.


11. pretty sure that i'm a misplaced member of generation x rather than a "millenial."  it would have been so awesome to be a teenager during the hair band craze, and in my 20s during the grunge era.

11 questions for my nominees


i'd like to nominate jennifer of one chicklette, and farah of la paradiddle! if you have a few minutes, it would be great to learn more about you ladies.


1. what was your first job?

2. is there a movie you can quote word-for-word? what is it?
3. what's been your favorite age, and why?
4. most attractive quality in the opposite sex?
5. how do you feel about oprah?
6. what destination is at the top of your travel wish list right now?
7. what's your sign/do you believe in astrology?
8. describe your perfect weekend.
9. bagel or english muffin?
10. what song would play during the opening scene in the movie about your life?
11. favorite amusement park ride?

Sunday, August 31, 2014

i can haz that house?


as some of you know, i've been looking to buy a house/condo/something that's not a cardboard box for about 7 months now. to paraphrase clueless, trying to find a nice, affordable place in the boston area on a single income is like trying to search for meaning in a pauly shore movie. i have, however, become crystal-clear about what i like and don't like. the conclusion? i either need more money, or the property brothers, or to move back to florida (NOPE). but i can still daydream. and i'mma do it right here, thanks to some pinterest porn. what's on your house wish list?


bungalow-style.

















a porch swing.





















butcher-block countertops.






















historic charm.























a fireplace.






















built-ins.






















a window seat or reading nook.


Thursday, August 21, 2014

(red) panda-monium

move over, boo and floppy bear. there are two new adorable animals in town: TWIN RED PANDA CUBS! apparently one is 2 kewl so there are only pictures of the attention-seeking brother. he's pretty much the kim kardashian of the red panda world.

i have some questions:

1) what are their names?
2) wtf is a red panda?
3) where and how can i obtain one?
4) are regular pandas pissed because red pandas have infinitely more swag?

but seriously.




ITS LITTLE PAWS!

Sunday, August 10, 2014

5 things i love: movie music scene edition

was originally going to do a rundown of my favorite movie scenes of all time, but realized that a good number of them involved music, so here goes. super honorable mention goes to the outstanding "faith"/dinner theatre scene from rules of attraction, but it's a little ... um, colorful for both this blog and a sunday morning.

1. wayne's world: "bohemian rhapsody"

i nearly forgot about this incredible moment in cinematic history until panic! at the disco performed a (surprisingly good!) cover of the queen classic at the concert i went to last weekend. brilliant from beginning to end.



2. sister act 2: "joyful, joyful"

SA2 is one of the few sequels that is actually better than the original. with great one liners like "go with god, crispy" and "yo' mama so fat, she sat on a rainbow and skittles popped out," and this uplifting performance of a hip-hop hymn remix that features pre-crazy lauryn hill and that dude from city high, it makes me so happy. AND THE CLOTHES. you down with G-O-D?



3. pretty in pink: "try a little tenderness"

ah, the good ol' days. before jon cryer headed down the dark path that was two and a half men. i don't think i'm the only one who's still a little pissed that molly ringwald picked the rich d-bag over duckie after he serenaded her like this. insane.



4. can't hardly wait: "paradise city"

unquestionably one of my favorite movies of all time. in this scene, the class geek gets some liquid courage and suddenly becomes the most popular dude around with this karaoke performance. the "this is the greatest night of my life!" kills me.



5. school of rock: battle of the bands

basically a rehash of the sister act 2 thing, but i'm a sucker for this stuff. the best part is that the top hat guitarist kid with the killer solo is actually a musical prodigy, not an actor, so it's legit. what am i doing with my life?!




Wednesday, July 30, 2014

"they said it couldn't be done": martha's vineyard in a day



after living in new england for almost two decades, i finally made my way to martha's vineyard on sunday with one of my best friends, sue, who had never been either. let me say up front that i now understand why everyone recommends that you take at least a weekend -- or a full week -- to explore the island, but i want to assure you that you can absolutely have a fun day trip if you pace yourself and plan ahead. sure, we drove 1.5 hours to a parking lot that was full, missed the 9:30 ferry, got lost on the nine-mile drive to the other parking lot, had to take a 25-minute shuttle to the ferry terminal, and barely made the 10:45 ferry. BUT STILL WORTH IT because we had a great day in MV.

  • the ferry

the ferry was a thing and it was actually kind of fun once we boarded it. there was wifi (good), annoying children (bad), a snack bar (good) and singing teenagers (bad). mixed bag, but it allows you to relax before beginning your adventure. pro tip: don't follow the people down the stairwell before the ship is docking, because they're not getting ready to disembark ... they're getting into the cars they drove onto the ferry. this mistake did help us come up with our hashtag for the day, though: #dontmindus. on our return trip, we had a nice man take a picture of us.

  • lobster rolls
we were a little miffed at the extensive travel hassles we had faced, so i utilized the free wifi on the ferry to find us the best goddamn lobster roll in vineyard haven, and it led us to the net result. it's a no-frills seafood market and takeout spot with a few picnic tables outside, but i'm pretty sure it was the best lobster roll i've ever had. barely any mayo -- score. some onions, lettuce, and tomato. and soooo meaty!

  • seafood shanty

after being deceived again by an MV transit staff member, we ended up in edgartown instead of oak bluffs and it started to rain. like a cape cod mirage, we stumbled upon this place called the seafood shanty that boasted a rooftop bar. 

as we ascended the stairs, we spotted bartenders wearing "sunday funday" shirts and two empty bar seats that backed up to the outdoor deck. as we sat down, we noticed that two fellows with perfect tans and vineyard vines attire were occupying some seats nearby. they basically could have been dawson's creek extras. i drank something with sweet tea vodka called a shan-tea, sue got a margarita, and we proceeded to chat with each other and make intense eye contact with our new friends but never actually talk to them, natch. we decided to press on when the weather cleared up, and when we realized we were exhibiting symptoms that chris d'elia describes in his "drunk girls" bit.  i can't wait to go back.


  • oak bluffs


our last (and my favorite) stop was oak bluffs. this town definitely felt the most "resort"-like to me, and there were a ton of cute shops, restaurants, and entertainment options, including the oldest carousel in america! which was actually kind of sad-looking. but still.

anyways, we grabbed some ice cream from mad martha's, and set off to explore the famous gingerbread cottages. 



not going to lie, the whole 'hood felt a liiiiittle cultlike, but i was still obsessed because the houses were so amazing. and people were making use of them, too! we saw several people on their porches reading, playing guitar, and just hangin' out. also, this dog:





i really wanted to find one particular house that i had read about last year on one of my favorite blogs, strawberry fields whatever.  and i did! this house was just so ridiculous and sweet and acid trippy and strawberry shortcake, and just the house i'd choose if i were to inherit a gingerbread cottage. obviously i had to get a picture in front of it (filtered to shit for that '70s virgin suicides effect).



after our little cottage walking tour, i bought a cottage magnet at one of the cheesy gift stores so i'll never forget them. we decided to stop for one final drink at this beachy spot called the sand bar that was completely dead and was playing reggae. the hippie-lookin' bartender chick carded us and said, in a low, dull voice, "you're both geminis." i was immediately so into this place. "are you a gemini?" i asked. "no, i'm a sag. but all my friends are gems," she replied, setting our seadog sunfishes in front of us and promptly disappearing. magical.

we hopped on the ferry and decided to grab some dinner back on the mainland at a place that overlooks the woods hole terminal, quicks hole. we ate at the "bar," which really just looks into the open kitchen, so it was fantastic and kinda fascinating. almost like hell's kitchen but with much less yelling. the perfect end to a vineyard day trip.




Wednesday, July 16, 2014

4 and 3 and 2 and 1



in the past week, i've rediscovered broad city and remembered how amazing it is. before comedy central picked up these hilarious ladies for a half-hour show, they had their own web series which was equally funny, and i see a little bit of myself in both of them. also love their back-and-forth banter. it's almost like a vulgar laverne & shirley or gilmore girls. if you don't know, now ya know. oh, and hannibal buress stars as ilana's kinda-sorta-boyfriend/hookup, who's also a dentist. what's not to love?

you may have seen this amazing fake rap video scene, but this is another favorite. the way ilana says "and she died? but she, like, died doing it," KILLS ME. a little inappropriate, but ... so what, who cares? 






Sunday, July 6, 2014

5 things i love right now

1.  this shirt


in general, i've been really into t-shirts that say things lately. and when i saw some dude wearing this at governors ball a few weeks ago, it really just spoke to me. basically because it really encapsulates my personality in a nutshell. er, t-shirt.

...the joke is that it's a picture of hanson, guys!

2. joe machi on "last comic standing"

kind of weird, incredibly hilarious. bit starts at 1:24. 



well, sort of. my mom has the best potato salad recipe of all time, and i can't seem to find it anywhere on the internet. also, i'm way too lazy to type up the recipe. but this one is VERY close. just put in less mayo and throw in some pickle relish. i've been known to eat this for a meal, it's that good.




mr. songz is totally the underrated king of the summer jam (have you forgotten about "say aah" or "bottoms up"?) and my summer spotify playlist is slowly being taken over by his new album, trigga. there's the sexy singles "foreign" and "na na" -- let's just ignore that it's a total fugees rip-off -- and my favorite raunchy deep cut/current solo dance party number "touchin', lovin'," which features the one and only nicki minaj. perfect carefree R&B for cruising with the windows down.

5. speakeasy-style bars



i know that this trend is kind of old news now, but whenever i discover a new "secret" spot, it makes me ridiculously happy. saloon in somerville has been one of my favorite local hangouts for a while now, but last week i made my first visit to backbar in nearby union square. much like my first visit to saloon, it took me a solid five minutes to find the entrance, as it was down an alley and looked like a restaurant service entrance. after you go down a long, dark, creepy hallway, you finally arrive in a bright, open, funky space. the friendly bartender set some spicy caramel popcorn down on the table and gave me some pointers after he discovered that i was a backbar virgin. my whiskey sour (called "choke up!" here because it's cool like that) was delicious, and the staff was so unpretentious and nice.  shh, don't tell anyone i told you how to get in!


Monday, June 23, 2014

she says that it's french, i know what it means



BONJOUR! imagine me saying that in my most perfect french accent, because in reality i probably sound more like brad pitt saying "BAWNGEEORNO" in inglorious bastards. i spent a long weekend in quebec city with my family and, all in in all, it's a pretty magical place. 

our hotel, l'hotel du vieux quebec, was super cute, perfectly located, and just generally fantastic. it's a family-owned boutique hotel, and has a cozy, charming vibe. the staff was extremely accommodating throughout our stay, and the room was comfy and spacious.

                                   

but it was extra touches like the the freakin' picnic basket breakfast placed on our door each morning --with pastries, fruit, yogurt, and OJ -- that took things above and beyond. you'd best believe i ate all the croissants every morning. there was also a nespresso machine and i became kind of addicted.



we watched the changing of the guard and took a tour of the citadelle, which was cool. the highlight for me, though, was the "official" goat named betsy who gave absolutely no fucks. like, i swear "fancy" by iggy azalea should have played every time she started walking (trotting?). observe:


speaking of animals, i ate bison cheek at this sweet little bistro, chez boulay. not kidding when i say it's in my top 10 meals of all time. it tasted like short rib, and was braised in red currant vinegar. along with the accompanying celery root, carrots, mushrooms, and onions, it was out of control awesome.


also ate poutine, and i swear that nothing has ever felt more right:



the city itself didn't necessarily feel all that much like europe to me, though i could see why people would say that. between the french-canadian locals and international tourists, it had a totally funky, eclectic vibe. i dug it, and i'm now entertaining fantasies of being a cool french-canadian hipster that doesn't know french and just wanders the streets. sorry, "rues". whatever.




perhaps the most popular attraction in the city is the chateau frontenac hotel. believe it or not, it's the most-photographed hotel in the world! i've now taken at least 20 of those photographs.



rue st. jean is one of the main thoroughfares in QC and is lined with shops, bars, and bistros. at night and on weekend days, the street is blocked off to cars, and pedestrians take over. as you can probably imagine, the people-watching is phenomenal. i saw someone dressed as beetlejuice and a group of punk teens dressed as lord of the rings characters. normal.



another great spot to sit and watch the world go by is the dufferin terrace, a boardwalk that runs in front of the chateau frontenac. there was a singer there, trudging through god-awful covers of downer tunes like sarah mclachlan's "angel," but eh. it was a gorgeous day and i was on vacation!



we also saw a street performer here who did a hand-balancing act. when he did a quick poll of the audience to see how many of us fools weren't french-speakers, he decided to translate the whole show. at one point, he purposely messed something up, and a few of us laughed. his response: "why you laughing? it's not funny. where you from, US?" pretty much.

however, i was very pleased at how sweet and friendly the locals were, as quebec tends to have an, um, reputation for not being so kind to americans. i was amazed at how many began speaking to us in english BEFORE we even said anything, though! how did they know? 

and while we're on the topic of cultural differences, the tinder conversations i had were all quite amusing (context: my tagline is "all sizzle. all steak."). 



also, fun fact: KFC is PFK up in quebec, and i don't think anyone was as amused by this as i was.


my favorite neighborhood was the quartier petit champlain, in the lower town. it's quaint and vibrant, with brightly-colored buildings and street-lamps. we stumbled into a restaurant in this neighborhood for dinner on our final night, bistro sous le fort, and it had a wonderful atmosphere and equally amazing food!





on the way home, the U.S. customs agent jokingly called me a "miscreant" and asked me if i brought back any canadian boyfriends. i said "i wish" and he chuckled. now i HAVE to go back, right?

until next time, QC ... au revoir!