Wednesday, October 19, 2016

the best of texts from friends (and mom), part 4

in this edition, we have:

regrettable bar behavior:

makeout adventures that would make theodor geisel proud:

a full conversation that i never even had the chance to join:

unsolicited terrible tattoos:

incredulous observations:

epic sexts within a text (how meta):

online dating advice-seeking:

early bird special reports from mom:

and as always, dads:

Sunday, October 9, 2016

my fling with blue apron

isn't my kitchen beautiful? jk, i stole this from groupon

"it's easy," they said. "you'll love it!" they said. and by "they," i mean the evil marketing geniuses at blue apron, arguably the most popular meal delivery service. so, i took the plunge and signed up, hoping that it would inspire me to cook more and branch out in terms of my recipe repertoire. i lasted approximately a week and a half, and made three of the six meals they sent me before admitting defeat.

yes, i will admit that it was extremely nice to receive perfectly-portioned ingredients for all of the meals (seriously, even flour and butter). but there were so. many. ingredients. and so. many. steps. and i'm pretty sure i used all of the pots and pans in my apartment for each of the recipes. oh, they try to trick you into believing there are only six or so steps, but do not be fooled! each "step" is actually like 20. exhibit a:

aw hell naw!
don't get me wrong, the dinners were delicious. i made the beef & shishito pepper open-faced sandwiches:

and the crispy catfish with kale-farro salad and warm grape relish:

and the pimento cheeseburgers with collard greens and carrot slaw, which i forgot to take a picture of. they were all great, but it was way too much food for one person, and i'm not much of a leftovers girl, so the whole thing became pretty damn overwhelming (and slightly depressing) pretty fast.

not to mention, by the time i finished washing dishes, i felt less like a spunky, childless 30 year-old woman and more like a jaded soccer mom who was ready to feign a headache to her husband for the third night in a row. one mini-existential crisis and a freezer full of abandoned meals later, i gleefully canceled my subscription and was filled with indescribable relief. grubhub, i'm back, baby!

for couples and families, blue apron seems like it could be a great way to get more creative with meals and potentially save a very small amount of time and money on grocery shopping. however, if you're slicing and sauteing solo, i'd stick to your own devices. but, to paraphrase the old adage, better to have blue aproned and lost than never to have blue aproned at all.

Sunday, October 2, 2016

show review: diarrhea planet at the sinclair

the t-shirt i bought last night/the best t-shirt i'll ever own

gather 'round, kids ... let me tell you the story of a band called diarrhea planet, who have inspired air guitarists and drummers, made uptight prudes scowl at the mere mention of their name, and melted faces across the country.

i first discovered the six-piece revelation back in 2011ish, along with some of my other favorite nashville acts like natural child, JEFF the brotherhood, and pujol, but didn't witness their epic live show until last year. they played great scott, which is the size of a shoebox, and my friend and i were among the ... oh, four or so women in attendance. after having my mind completely blown by the four-guitar assault, i knew i couldn't go a full year without seeing them again.

this time around, they moved to my favorite venue in the area (the sinclair) and i was pleased to see that the female contingent was higher (though it was mostly just dutiful girlfriends ... sigh).

i arrived at the tail end of the first opener, local band salem wolves. they had great stage presence and solid chops, but weren't quite my cup of tea music-wise. straightforward, bad religion-esque punk would probably be the best way to describe them.

next up was western medication, a fellow nashville outfit and possibly my new favorite band. live, the vocals made me think of king tuff and white reaper, but not so much now that i'm listening to their album. and i still can't put my finger on what the music itself reminds me of. smith westerns, maybe? stone roses? it's driving me insane. regardless, i'm a big fan.

(update: i just read a youtube comment after i typed that paragraph about how they sound like smith westerns. can someone pay me for this?)

and finally, the main event ... the one, the only, the planet of diarrhea. if you haven't had the pleasure of experiencing one of their concerts, i can only liken it to a 45-minute roller coaster ride of stage-diving, fist-pumping, guitar-shredding goodness that leaves you wondering where you are and what just happened to you in its aftermath-- in the best way. the fact that nearly all of the members trade off vocal duties makes for an exciting and dynamic show as well. at one point, i was covered in beer (and god knows what else) and could not care less because i was headbanging and screaming "STREET RIP!" the power of diarrhea planet, man.

this wasn't my first rodeo, so i knew to stay as far as i could from the front of the crowd, where punk bros-a-plenty moshed the night away. 

guitarist jordan even got in on the action towards the end, simultaneously surfing and playing. siiiick.

if you're still not sold, i'll leave you with one of my favorite d-planet videos, a homage to nickelodeon classic pete and pete. aw yeah.