3 days in philly

despite being a northeastern native through and through, i had never spent any time in philadelphia beyond eating a cheesesteak at a bennigan's when i was 13 and my family was considering a move to cherry hill, new jersey (no offense to jersey folk, but i am very glad that move did not occur). so, with four days off of work for the fourth of july and everyone starting to slowly venture back out into the world, i figured it was the perfect time to check it off the list!

DAY 1:

i took the acela, which was actually pretty painless except for having to wake up at the crack of dawn to catch it. i got to philly in just about five hours and grabbed a lyft to my airbnb near rittenhouse square. 

i stayed in what's known as a "trinity" house, or a rowhouse that essentially has one room on each floor; it was actually featured on the show tiny house hunting a couple years ago. it was brimming with charm and character (my kryptonite!) but i will admit it would probably drive me insane to actually live there because even during my few-day stay, i kept forgetting shit upstairs or downstairs and had to go up and down the narrow spiral stairs and it was annoying af. but honestly...worth it for the ~aesthetic~.

once I dropped my stuff off, my first order of business was obviously to get a cheesesteak, so i made a beeline for jim's on south street, which i had been assured by several friends was the superior steak slinger (and in fact, the recommendation was prefaced every time with strong warnings to avoid pat's and geno's at all costs). 

the line was surprisingly short for it being 1:30pm on a friday, and even though i had been mentally rehearsing "whiz wit" for hours on the train ride, i was legit sweating—both from anxiety and the sizzling grill—as i approached the counter, especially as i heard each person in front of me in line, one by one, order incorrectly (aka completely normally). no matter...i remained fully committed and when the dude prompted me with a slightly gruff "whatchu want?" i cheerfully chirped "one whiz wit!" and i guess it worked because minutes later i was holding a beautiful steak sandwich with cheez whiz. still dreaming about it.

also, i ended up putting my mask on in line because people were all up in my space breathing on me, and when i was walking upstairs to the dining area, an employee goes, "miss, i just have to tell you that i do love your face mask [sidenote: it has musical notes on it]. i find it very...resonant. it really resonates with me." lolol.

because my phone is at the age where it is on the verge of death within like, two hours, i wandered down to function coffee labs, an adorable little spot, to charge it for a bit while sipping on a deeee-licious orange creamsicle latte. seriously, it tasted like childhood! amazing.  

lol @ the letterboard sign

i took a quick lil' stroll through the italian market....

and it was onto philadelphia's magic gardens. not much to say about them except they are so dope and totally worth the visit. it's basically a massive, living mosaic, created by artist isaiah zagar, that you can walk through. there's all these little tchotchkes, found objects, and cool little elements everywhere you look, and the fact that one guy created all of this is pretty insane.

then, i saw a sign for something called raxx vintage emporium, so naaaaturally i had to pop on in. as a woman with a major weakness for both weird knicknacks and t-shirts that say dumb things on them, i was in heaven. the knickknacks were the weirdest. the t-shirts were the dumbest. UNFORTUNATELY, the prices were also the highest. like, these tees are fantastic, but should be $10, $15 max! 

i also inserted myself into a conversation between staff members when one of them asked the other “do you remember the nickelodeon show the secret world of alex mack? and she replied “i’ve heard the name…” and i unintentionally made some pained noise aloud and they looked at me and i was like “man, you are making me feel old. i’m 35 and it hurts my heart that you don’t know alex mack! it’s a classic.” thankfully, the guy posing the question, who was 30, agreed with me. love 2 be an elder millennial!

my favorite thing to do when exploring a new city (y’know, aside from walking around) is to visit lowbrow and highbrow places in quick succession. i mean, i also love doing that at home, but it’s extra fun on vacation. for example: multiple philly friends told me i simply had to make a visit to the amazingly named and wildly decorated dive bar tattooed mom, not too far from the magic gardens on south street. 

between the punk soundtrack, the amazing leopard-print couch, and graffiti and stickers and art covering every square centimeter of the walls and ceilings, it made all of my dreams come true, for real. i reunited with a long-lost emerson friend, emily, and it was so good to catch up with her! she got a beer, but i decided to go all out and order the “pop rocket” cocktail, which had stoli raspberry, raspberry liquer, lemon soda, and POP ROCKS. incredible.

a visual representation of the inside of my brain

two of my favorite things in the entire world are whiskey sours and crab cakes, so when researching places to eat, you can bet i had my eye on the olde bar, this newish spot that's housed in the old original bookbinder's, a legendary seafood restaurant that opened in 1898 and closed in 2009. the olde bar's menu is a nod to the bookbinder's classics, and from the tin ceiling to the little ashtrays in the bathroom stalls (!), many of the cool, vintage architectural and interior touches remain.

truly, the most important thing i've learned as an adult is to ALWAYS MAKE A RESERVATION. it takes literally two minutes, it's free, you can always cancel if your plans change, and you. have. a. guaranteed. table. it took me way too long to actually get this through my head, but i finally had enough a few years ago after far too many friday and saturday nights with friends where we rolled up at like 6 or 7pm to a popular spot being like "it'll be fine!" and it was never, ever, ever fine. 

anywho...long story short, once i'd decided prior to the trip that the olde bar would probably be my friday night restaurant of choice, i made a reservation for two people and figured i'd see if emily wanted to join me, and just show up solo and claim that she ditched me if not. thankfully, she was all in and we had a fabulous old-school evening complete with whiskey sours and buffalo cauliflower and crab cakes and tuna frites and the chillest waiter of all time (like, he would literally do multiple drive-bys and be like "hope you're enjoying your drinks, see ya!" when we were trying to get his attention to order, hahaha). i also developed a crush on a bartender after we shared what emily referred to as a "tender moment" of smily eye contact that never happened again. standard.

we ended the night by taking in the absolutely insane stormy sunset and checking out an artisan market at cherry street pier.

DAY 2:

i continued on my quest to visit all of the coffee shops in philly (and the world, really) at elixr, where i had a yogurt parfait and another revelation of a drink: something called a "tahini shakerato," which was described as "a shaken combination of espresso, oat milk, soom tahini, super floral honey, and cinnamon over ice." the texture was almost milkshakey but not toooo rich and omgitwassogood, shit. i want one again now!

shakerato in hand, i strolled through rittenhouse square, which was lush and charming and even more adorable because there was a farmers market happening, where this little boy in a cute hat was selling flowers and *sigh* it was perfect. 

then i hoofed it over to the old city for my walking tour. as i’ve mentioned before, i’m a huge fan of walking tours in new-to-me cities for a few different reasons. 1. it helps you knock out all of the sightseeing stuff you’d want to visit anyway 2. the guides are super informative and can tell you cool stories/give you context you wouldn’t have otherwise and 3. you have the potential to meet new people! in particular, i’m a fan of free tours by foot, whom i’ve done tours with in new orleans and charleston. it’s a pay-what-you-want model, and i’ve just always had good experiences with them. the philly tour included elfreth’s alley, the betsy ross house, christ’s church, the liberty bell (well, through a window, because there’s a LINE to see the dumb bell?), ben franklin’s grave, and a few other places. 

while the cheesesteak is king around these parts, i had heard almost as much about the roast pork sandwich with sharp provolone and broccoli raab at tommy dinic’s in reading terminal market (a massive food hall), so once i found it amongst the million vendors, i hopped in line to try one.

for some stupid reason, i didn't want to sit at their counter because it was right next to the line of people and i needed my *space*, so i walked around for 20 minutes looking for a seat, gave up and got annoyed, got lost trying to find the counter again, and took my sandwich to love park where i watched people wait in line to take pics with the love sign and made awkward food moans. it was so damn good, yo.

right across the street is dilworth park, where there was a super cute roller skating rink. i'm telling y'all, it's the summer of skating!

SHOCKINGLY, my phone was dying again, so i figured it was a good excuse to pop into philly's famous la colombe coffee roasters for an oatmilk draft latte. i had impeccable timing because right then, the sky totally opened up and it started pouring for two solid hours.

but i could not leave the city without eating a soft pretzel, and so i walked back in the rain to the market and got a cinnamon-sugar pretzel from miller's twist and ate it outside in a "stall" that smelled like lots of not nice things but i just concentrated on the yummy pretzel and it was fine.

just prior to my trip, i had the bright idea to check and see if bourdain ever did a philadelphia episode of one of his shows, and indeed he did! on season 2 of the layover, he dedicated a show to philly, and knocked a few back at dirty frank's, so i immediately added it to my list. cash-only, no-frills. loved it and ordered a PBR because getting anything else felt wrong. can you spot bourdain in this photo??

for the second day in a row, i chased my dirty dive experience with an upscale eatery one. i feel like the older i get, the more i want to always be in very beautiful and chill places with lots of plants and lots of twinkly lights. i had seen harp & crown on instagram and was all "PLAAAANTS. TWIIINKLE!" and when my childhood friend tori wanted to grab dinner on saturday night i was like "mmm yes, i know just the place!" 

i had a glass of sauv blanc and she got a vodka/strawberry/champagne cocktail and we shared spicy soppressata pizza with shishito peppers/honey/provolone, tuna carpaccio, and garlic shrimp with white wine/paprika/lemon.

tori and i then tried to walk to this park, spruce street, but once again it started pouring, so we ducked into craftsman row saloon to get out of the rain. it was fine but it reminded me of a bar that would be in boston in a bad way. something in faneuil hall that's trying to be cool, but is really just a dark, generic gastropub? even the name sounds that way, right? i don't mean to disparage it! the staff was very sweet and my cocktail (the "worth a shot" with whiskey, honey, lemon, and white peppercorn) was good! but the vibes were just...strange. idk. they're apparently known for their insane milkshakes, so i probably should have tried one of those, but i was too full.

DAY 3:

coffee this morning was from OCF, a little spot around the corner from my airbnb. i strolled down the picturesque and always-illuminated addison street...

then i walked along the schuykill (pronounced "skoo-kull," i think?) river trail to the philadelphia museum of art, where admission was pay-what-you-want for the fourth of july. score! oh, i obviously had to run up the rocky steps, too.

and because all of the plants and twinkly lights were simply not enough to satiate me the previous evening, i met up with my friend jenny for brunch at talula's garden, an absolute fairytale dreamland where we had french toast sticks, beet-cured salmon gravlax, and avocado toast while talking about the hills and watching dutiful instagram boyfriends take photos of their ladies posing with mimosas. beautiful.

of course, #1 on my philly to-do list was to make a pilgrimage to the kurt vile mural that serves as the cover for my favorite KV album, wakin on a pretty daze. it's all the way up in fishtown, which i guess is the williamsburg of philadelphia? anyway, i got my photo before realizing there was a woman hunched over doing...something...in the parking lot behind me (puking? drugs? peeing? didn't stick around to find out). the whole area felt very apocalyptic and industrial and weird, so that was enough fishtown for me.

back in the center city area, i really, really wanted to grab a drink at this place called writer's block rehab, but they were closed for the holiday, so i just snapped a quick photo of the amazing lil' nas x mural on the side of the building:

i'd heard good things about the happy hour at double knot, a sushi bar, so i stopped in to order white wine and a spicy tuna roll. it was fine...but i was literally the only person at the bar—they apparently have a downstairs which sounded much more fun, but i was kind of intimidated because they had a separate host and i was unsure if they had a bar down there or just tables or what, so i sat with my sad wine and spicy tuna upstairs and made a break for it when the rain cleared. :(

for dinner, i sidled up to the bar at bud & marilyn's, an upscale comfort food spot with a '70s retro flair. i ordered a marilyn's old-fashioned (brandy, sprite, orange, cherry) and the seared "brick" chicken (a half-chicken with pickled heirloom tomato and roasted peppers, garlic-lemon drippings, paprika butter, herbs, and toasted sourdough). both amazing; the best cocktail and meal i had in philadelphia.

i sipped my drink and chowed down while the rowdy patrons down the bar ordered seven lemon drop shots, and then a dude plopped down a couple seats away from me, rudely talking on his phone in a foreign language, and immediately tried to buy me a beer while still on the phone. "i have my own drink, thanks!" i said dismissively. he continued trying to chat me up and i soon discovered he was a fencing coach from belarus who lives in georgia and was in town to recruit high school students. this is why i love eating at the bar, guys. 

we actually had a pretty interesting/fun/playful conversation that mostly revolved around his absolute incredulity that i, a woman, could be on a trip by myself for fun, and that i could eat that much chicken. he asked for my number and i gave it to him, both because i'm an idiot and because he did the thing where he had me put my number in his phone and he called it right then and there, so i couldn't get away with giving a fake. does anyone have any good advice for what to do in these situations? 

dear reader, i'd love to tell you that we fell madly in love, but i actually ended up having to block him when he started texting and calling me incessantly after i left (including, i shit you not, a text with nothing but the name of his hotel. yes, sure thing, with shakespearean sweet talk like that, i'll be right over, bro!) but alas. five stars for the old fashioned and the chicken!

post-dinner, after a brief, small crisis in which i turned my ankle on a cute cobblestoned street in front of unsuspecting residents having a barbecue and scraped my foot and had to go buy band-aids, i was craving a plain ol' ice cream cone and for the life of me, i. could. not. find. one. i ended up walking 20 minutes to sweet charlie's, a chain i'd never heard of nor been to. well, folks, they specialize in "rolled ice cream," which apparently takes like 45 fucking minutes to "make," and i was sweating and the weird belarusian guy was blowing up my phone and i was having a moment. but then i ate my festive little rolled ice cream and it was okay and i walked back to my airbnb to the sound of fireworks, then watched the fireworks on tv in the luxurious, air-conditioned comfort of my cute lil' trinity because i was tired and my feet hurt.

on my first afternoon, i walked by this insanely cute coffee shop, good karma cafe, and made a mental note to come back before i left. i had a few hours to kill before my train the following day and it wasn't too far of a walk from my airbnb, so i ordered a croissant and their "brown bear" latte with oat milk, caramel, and dominican mocha and sat at a little table outside to enjoy them. 

and then a kind of weird/funny thing happened that only i really care about, but this is my blog so you can deal. like a month ago when i was in the berkshires, i went into this store that was playing a song that caught my ear; i could tell from the voice it was by bad suns, a band i tend to dig whenever i hear their tunes but don't really seek out, but it ended before i could shazam it. i planned to look it up later but just totally forgot about it. so i'm sitting at this cafe and a guy who had been sitting nearby gets up to ride away on his electric scooter, and music starts blasting from it? slight rudeness aside, i'm into it! i shazam it, and what do you know? "daft pretty boys" by bad suns! almost positive it's the same song which is even stranger because it's like four years old. the universe comin' in hot! 

i also share this story to illustrate one of the things i love most about life that people don't talk about very much. like, if i hadn't been sitting there right then, i wouldn't have heard my current favorite song until who knows when. and scooter guy has NO IDEA that he helped me discover it; hell, he might have just been listening to a random playlist and not even know the song either! do you love it? because i love it. we're all connected in this crazy cosmic world, babyyy.

so, yeah, anyway. i still have like at least 15 places on my list that i didn't get a chance to visit, so i suppose a return philly trip is in order! 

here are some other assorted favorite photos:

5 things i love: summer albums edition

quoth rob thomas in 1999, "man, it's a hot one." as i sit in front of my floor AC unit in my dining room, melting in this 90+-degree heat, i'm thinking about the albums that i always return to without fail every summer because they bring me back to more carefree days. linked to spotify for easy listening! what are your essential summer albums? 

1. superchunk - here's where the strings come in (1995)

i first discovered superchunk and this album in the summer of 2006 on a music blog i used to read religiously and, for the life of me, cannot remember the name of now. i'm sure it's been taken down because it used to post, like, zip files of full albums and downloadable mp3s in the pre-streaming era, but i discovered so many great records and bands through it (tapes 'n' tapes, walt mink, test icicles, etc. etc.) and it's driving me insane that i can't recall it! oh yes, sorry, superchunk. since i first heard here's where the strings come in when i was a wee 20-year-old, superchunk has become one of my absolute favorite bands. i've gotten to see them live twice, and the audience is comprised of chill gen-x dads AKA the loves of my life, and it's all great. it's likely for nostalgic reasons that this particular album will always be my favorite, but it really has everything you need: college rock vibes, kinda-high-pitched male vocals, upbeat jams, mid-paced rockers, and a couple slow laments. 

2. ashlee simpson - autobiography (2004)

speaking of nostalgia, i cannot explain to you why — as if i have an alarm set for a particular time every year in early to mid-june — my fingers navigate to autobiography on spotify, i listen from beginning to end, and then i don't listen again until the following june. i do think it has something to do with the fact that "pieces of me" was an integral part of my soundtrack for driving around in suburban new hampshire during the summer after i graduated high school, and the ashlee simpson show was a thing, and then i saw ryan cabrera perform for free at the pheasant lane mall at some point, and it was all just a beautiful blur of pop-rock glory (pre-SNL incident) that i'll never get to enjoy again. those first notes of "surrender" bring me right back every time, man, and it feels soooo good!

3. the lemonheads - it's a shame about ray (1992)

sorry not sorry that the lemonheads have essentially become part of my personal brand and i talk about them or evan dando...probably two to three times a week? i basically have lemonheads radar; a perfect example is when i walked into a tattoo shop last summer and my artist had a small lemonheads sticker on his water bottle which was on the ground in the corner and i was like "HI I LOVE THE LEMONHEADS!" and he was like "uh..." but then once he realized what the fuck i was talking about, he got excited and we talked about them for at least half the time he was tattooing me and it was a very great, bostonian experience. 

my favorite, favorite summer activity is to put this album on and wander around the city (beacon hill, preferably) and imagine i'm back in '92 and dating a tortured grunge musician. the best way i've found to describe the feeling it's a shame about ray gives me (because i've thought about it a lot, obvs), is "sitting on a rooftop at night at the beginning of summer, eating ice cream and smoking cigarettes and making out with a cute guy you've been on two dates with." giddy and flirty and sweet and infinite. does that make sense? honest to god, one of the saddest things i ever learned was that the "mount vernon street" referenced in the lyrics of "kitchen" is NOT mount vernon street in beacon hill. apparently one of the other band members wrote the song and it's about somewhere in australia or some bull? i refuse to accept it so i will continue walking down mount vernon street and believing my made-up boston version. above, the best live performance of "it's a shame about ray" and possibly the best lemonheads performance ever.

4. american bang - self-titled (2010)

i love jaren johnston's voice so much that i would be happy hearing him sing the damn phone book. based out of nashville, american bang was the first incarnation of what is now the cadillac three (still love 'em and seeing 'em live in september!), but this upbeat album was my introduction to their southern rock stylings and it still holds up today. nothing deep or profound, just solid, riffy road trip fare with lots of hooks and excellent melodies. i still contend that "whiskey walk" has one of my favorite choruses of all time. 

5. better than ezra - closer (2001)

i've talked at length about how BTE are by far the most underrated of all the '90s alt-rock bands and if i'm being honest, they might be in my top 10 bands...ever? wild. i was 15 years old the summer this record came out, and i think this was the one that really bonded me to the band. kevin griffin's a master storyteller and his songwriting is so interesting and clever (the above tune, from the perspective of someone who stalked the band, is my personal favorite). sunny, breezy vibes abound throughout the album — even the cheesier elements like the record scratching in "extra ordinary" and "recognize" somehow work for me. listening to it now brings back fond memories of wandering around in the mall AC on hot days, convincing my mom to buy me expensive tank tops from express, and eating a reese's pieces sundae at friendly's. TAKE. ME. BACK.

5 things i love right now

1. this song by alaska reid, "boys from town"

i'm getting crunchier anna burch vibes here and i love it. apparently, alaska is not from alaska, but from montana. i've never been to montana, but this song (and entire album, big bunny) sounds exactly like how i'd expect an album by an indie singer-songwriter from montana to sound. i mean that as a compliment, obviously. that pre-chorus is pure magic!

2. this book by jessi klein, you'll grow out of it

have you ever read a book about the EXACT moment in life you're currently experiencing? comedian jessi klein's essay collection is 1000% that for me right now. there are essays about filling your free time as a 30-something single person, essays about anthropologie, and essays about just feeling generally out of place as a particular kind of woman (slightly anxious, not particularly girly-girl or flirtatious, joke-cracking, and late-blooming) in the world. it's not only making me laugh, but it's making me feel a whole lot less alone at the moment.

3. this video of evan dando from the lemonheads singing in a walgreens on cape cod

Just had a special guest appearance at Walgreens by artist @Evan_Dando (lead singer of the group the Lemonheads). Thank you Evan, you sounded great as always! pic.twitter.com/GB6XOBPfnS

— Mike Ghelfi (@GhelfiPC93) March 1, 2021

put your mask back on, evan!!! but seriously, barring that, this is basically my favorite thing that has happened in 2021 because i am here for any and all content related to evan dando/the lemonheads. plus, this is just such a great story. basically, he lost his wallet "walking from a hotel" in falmouth (drugs, probably?) and tweeted about it. then, the walgreens manager told him someone had turned it into them and i guess when he claimed it, he decided to give them an impromptu serenade of "confetti,"which is definitely in my top five lemonheads songs. sigh.

4. this garfield shirt which i may or may not purchase because it's my forever mood

5. this 2014 movie that i somehow missed, two night stand

just when i thought quar had depleted me of frothy romantic comedies to watch, amazon prime suggested this to me and i was as giddy as a child on christmas morning. miles teller? analeigh tipton from crazy. stupid. love? a plot that revolves around an app-based hookup and a new york city blizzard that forces the two main characters to fall in love? how the hell did this pass me by in my late 20s when it came out?? regardless, all that matters is that i've watched it now and i highly recommend it for lighthearted and feel-good viewing. sidenote: it also has a great soundtrack that introduced me to a bunch of tunes i'm currently obsessed with, like "nuclear seasons" by charli xcx.

what i've been watching lately

a teacher (hulu)

9/10

a teacher-student affair plotline has so many chances to go terribly awry, but i think a teacher really nails it — showing the reality of the consequences and long-term repercussions that result on both sides. both nick robinson and kate mara are absolutely fantastic, giving the nuanced and complex performances that this type of show demands. i, the worst binge-watcher in the world, blew through the 10 episodes in two days.

black bear (on demand/amazon prime)

6/10

okay, so i THINK i liked this but i'm still not quite sure?? i definitely can't stop thinking about it because i didn't really get it, so that's...something. i don't even really know how to describe it without spoilers except to say that it stars christopher abbott (charlie from GIRLS) and aubrey plaza, and it's dark and weird and very meta. i feel like it's what i wanted i'm thinking about ending things to be...almost. the first scene involves a young woman (plaza) who is staying at a couple's (abbott and sarah gadon) rural cabin to work on her screenplay. drama and weirdness ensues. idk. i'd love to discuss with anyone else who's watched it.

pretend it's a city (netflix)

8/10

so basically, fran lebowitz is a national treasure and i want to be her when i grow up. i'd heard her name previously, but it wasn't until i read this great profile of her in the new yorker that i became fascinated. so when i saw that netflix was releasing a docuseries about her, i was so excited to learn more. her dry musings remind me of jerry seinfeld with an edge, and she's lived a fascinating life in new york city (working for andy warhol at interview magazine, hanging with early glam and punk bands like the new york dolls in the '70s). plus, it's just an absolute joy seeing martin scorsese doubled-over with laughter at nearly everything she says, even if it's not THAT funny. i would have loved to delve deeper into her past since a lot of it revolves around her observations about current life in the city, but overall, i loved it. and don't even get me started on the NYT "takedown" piece the other day; just let people enjoy things!

the incredible jessica james (netflix)

6.5/10

i'd been meaning to watch this for like three years and just never got around to it. it was aiight, but i remember it being so hyped up that i guess i expected a little more. and like, i get that the title character is fictional, but her personality was so off-putting and brusque that it became bothersome to me and kept taking me out of the story. it was partially for this reason—along with the total lack of chemistry—that made the romance with chris o'doud (the dude from bridesmaids and jessa's husband on GIRLS) pretty unbelievable. it was unique enough that it kept me watching until the end, though, so it had that going for it.

the ultimate playlist of noise (hulu)

6/10

this one was super-heavy on the cheese, but i feel like most of us could use a little of that right now, eh? even the premise is a bit much: music-loving teenager finds out he has a brain tumor and the subsequent surgery will cause him to lose his hearing permanently, so he sets out on a road trip (with his female love interest, natch) to capture his favorite sounds in the world before he can't enjoy them anymore. i know, you're probably rolling your eyes, but i'll be damned if i wasn't tearing up a bit at the inevitable montage of sounds they recorded. it had major john green vibes and reminded me of paper towns specifically, which i really enjoyed. so if you're into that particular flavor of YA movie, you'll probably dig this one.

the sister (hulu)

5/10

hmmm. this miniseries originally aired in the UK, and i feel like maybe i needed to be british to fully appreciate it. the idea is that a man shows upon the doorstep of his old friend, and threatens to expose something if he doesn't help him out. we slowly find out what that is and the suspense kept me watching for four episodes, but overall, it fell a bit flat for me. it also didn't help that i kept having to rewind because the protagonist kept mumbling on top of his accent and i was like "YOU SOUND LIKE YOU'RE FROM LONDON AND I CAN'T UNDERSTAND A BLOODY WORD!"

2020 in review and 2021 goals

in this strangest of years, i didn't do as much as i would have liked—who did?— but here's the big stuff that happened in brief. i: took a solo trip to LA, got laid off, co-wrote a book, made my own ice cream, baked a LOT, got another tattoo (see below), got another job, and adopted a cat.

since a tiny sliver of hope is on the horizon, i'm remaining optimistic and came up with 21 pretty realistic to-dos for '21. i'd love to hear your goals for what's hopefully a better year ahead. 

1. successfully release my first book!

2. book an international trip

3. GO TO A CONCERT

4. host a celebratory dinner party

5. take a french class

6. place a piece somewhere i've never been published before

7. see a movie in a movie theater

8. read 20 9 books

9. have an indulgent, expensive, delicious meal *inside* of a restaurant

10. renew my passport

11. write a letter to myself to open in 10 years

12. make a new friend

13. find out my blood type

14. play the lottery

15. make a collage

16. learn a dance routine

17. chill in a hammock

18. stay in a beach house or cabin

19. compliment a stranger 

20. visit the site of a scene from a movie or tv show

21. make pralines

and here are some best-of 2020 lists...

favorite books:

and now we have everything: on motherhood before i was ready by meaghan o'connell

oona out of order by margarita montimore

spinster by kate bolick

my misspent youth by meghan daum

acid for the children by flea

seinfeldia: how a show about nothing changed everything by jennifer keishin armstrong

we are never meeting in real life by samantha irby

alright alright alright: the oral history of richard linklater's dazed and confused by melissa maerz

favorite movies:

banana split

in a relationship

the king of staten island

straight up

favorite tv shows:

looking for alaska

shrill

the circle

high fidelity

little fires everywhere

being erica

emily in paris (it made me happy, sue me)

favorite albums: 

(if you missed my favorite songs post, that's here.)

(also, harry styles would be included if his album wasn't technically released in 2019.)

the strokes - the new abnormal

momma - two of me

machine gun kelly - tickets to my downfall

hockey dad - brain candy

best coast - always tomorrow

gateway drugs - PSA

pope- the lunchbox EP

random miscellaneous things i loved:

discovering the best dancer i've ever seen in those choreography videos, a french timothée chalamet doppelgänger named andy daveiga

the reply all podcast episode "the case of the missing hit"

the heavyweight podcast episode "bobby"

this documentary about '80s malls on youtube, mall city

dakota johnson's architectural digest house tour:

2020 goals in review:

1. get another tattoo: DONE

third tattoo's a charm? i took the plunge in july, after isolation made me nutty and i was struck with a major case of tattoo fever. i got the three of wands from the wild unknown tarot, which is all about adventure and exploration and life's magic, on my right inner bicep. i absolutely love this description of it:

Three wands are bound together, forming an inverted triangle. As you gaze into the center, you see a rainbow swirl. Is this a vortex? Another dimension? The future? Or something else entirely? That is for you to find out.

Branches jut out from the wands, they stand in contrast to the perfectly pruned wands we saw in the previous card. There is a juxtaposition in this card of structure and liberation: the wands come together to form a cohesive shape, yet the wands themselves are rugged, not perfectly manicured. These wands are free-spirited, yet also collected.

The background is filled with horizontal black lines, indicating a stable energy. This lack of flashiness draws your full attention to the wands, and above all else, to the colorful vision at the center. The swirling rainbow beckons you to leave behind the drab, colorless surroundings and explore all the magic life has to offer!

You are a visionary if you let yourself be one. You can look beyond obstacles. You can see beyond the mundane world. Endless terrain is out there for you to explore, if only you choose to say YES. The Three of Wands offers you a chance to survey the landscape around you. You need not rely on someone else’s map – you are exploring the wilderness for yourself, charting it according to your experience, your interpretation. 

Your future is a blank canvas – and all the colors of the rainbow are available for you to create your experience going forward. There is no guarantee of exactly what you’ll find as you continue your explorations. Magic and wonder abound, yes – but illusions and setbacks are part of the journey, as well.

Some structure is useful, so give yourself a moment to survey your inner and outer landscape. The Three of Wands is about trusting your gut, but it’s also about surveying the energies around you. It is about action, yes – but it is about the kind of action that is born of intention, not impulse. The paradox here is you can only do so much planning and intention setting – eventually, you’ve just got to venture on and see where this portal takes you. 

7. get a photo taken with a celebrity: DONE

and in the first three weeks of the year, to boot! i met hilary duff on the first friggin' night of my LA vacation in january, which was just about the only bright spot in this horrid year. lizzie mcguire forever.

11. meet an internet friend IRL: DONE

also in LA, i met my longtime twitter friend heather at the butcher, the baker, the cappucino maker, where we got colorful lattes and chatted for hours.

14. publish 10 humor pieces: PARTIALLY DONE

my brain was broken for most of the year, because...2020, but i managed to squeak out these three:

naughty post-isolation fantasies (mcsweeney’s)

the bigger picture: to all the panda express employees i've ghosted before

slackjaw: introducing xjessicax, the emo american girl doll

i also self-published a few essays: 

death by digital

time to make the donuts

how to live alone

16. make pizza from scratch: DONE

not the cutest, but i had fun making it, at least.

17. buy myself flowers: DONE

let's hear it for trader joe's $3 bouquets, y'all!