my 2014 to-do list

four years ago, i decided that resolutions pretty much suck, and that it's so much more satisfying -- and tangible -- to check the items off as you go through the year. an annual "things to do" list was born! after coming up with 100 things for 2011 and 2012, i pared it down to 50 for 2013 and got even more focused this year. going for quality over quantity, and repeating some that i still haven't accomplished (#3, #27, #39). what do you want to tick off of your list in 2014?

1. purchase a home
2. visit new orleans
3. be in a music video
4. take a cooking class
5. swim in an infinity pool
6. finish my book proposal
7. learn enough french to get around
8. use a terrible pick-up line on a random guy
9. visit somewhere that's haunted
10. color my hair
11. get business cards
12. dine at 5  restaurants on the eater boston 38
13. make a collage
14. watch a whole TV series that i've never seen before
15. take the jeopardy online test
16. try air bnb
17. get something that i wrote published on mcsweeney's
18. go to a state fair
19. do volunteer work
20. visit martha's vineyard
21. drink a "green smoothie" :(
22. overcome my eyelash-curling phobia
23. write to a celebrity and receive a response (online or via snail mail)
24. see a (non-musical) play
25. say "yes" to something i want to say "no" to at first
26. make my own sushi
27. crash a wedding
28. buy a plant for my apartment (and don't kill it)
29. participate in a scavenger hunt
30. reconnect with an old friend or acquaintance
31. teach myself a dance routine via youtube tutorial
32. go sailing (or, at least, on a sailboat)
33. pack a picnic lunch and eat it on boston common
34. win at pub trivia
35. go to an ice bar
36. make my own pizza
37. win money from a slot machine or scratch ticket
38. send christmas cards
39. go out to dinner by myself
40. watch 5 movies on the IMDB top 250 that i've never seen before

my top 10 songs of 2013!

i started this tradition last year since my attention span is usually too short to deal with full albums unless they're completely amazing. what were your favorites from 2013?

p.s. you can enjoy all of these in playlist form right here.

honorable mention: wavves - "sail to the sun," driver friendly - "ghosts," smallpools - "mason jar," walk the moon - "tête-à-tête""

10. macklemore & ryan lewis f/ ray dalton - "can't hold us"



so this song was technically released all the way back in 2011, but let's be real -- were any of you cool enough to hear it back then? me neither. plus, it was re-released this year, so i'm counting it. i know everyone hates it now, but the first 20 or so times i listened to it were magic. ALRIGHT, OKAY!

9. parquet courts - "stoned & starving"


so early '90s/pavement-ish and i love it. simple. catchy. undeniably awesome bare-bones rock 'n roll.

8. fitz & the tantrums - "the walker"



every year-end song list has to have a tune that includes whistling, right? this one was in heavy rotation for me over the summer. it's just a ton of fun and has a great retro vibe. and so. much. soul!

7. the neighbourhood - "sweater weather"



proof that a song can be really hot without being vulgar. i mean, i appreciate the vulgarity too, don't get me wrong, but this is the most subtly sexy song i've heard in a long time. plus, it's the only one i know of that gives a shoutout to high-waisted shorts, aka my favorite item of clothing.

6. bass drum of death - "way out"



i'd been jamming out to BDOD's second album since he released it this past june, but actually didn't get into this song until i saw him perform it live a few months ago. kind of grungy, kind of psychedelic, kind of haunting, and totally delicious to my ears.

5. new politics - "harlem"



oh, this song deserved so much more than a taco bell commercial. i kept waiting for it to blow up and it just ... kind of never did. not really sure why, because you can't help but want to dance when that chorus hits.

4. queens of the stone age - "i sat by the ocean"



i'mma let you in on a secret. if you want me to do anything or go anywhere, just have josh homme sing the request to me. sigh. it's no "how to handle a rope," but it's a killer track nonetheless.

3. one direction - "kiss you"



1D keeps sneaking onto my list every year. how did they make it into the top five?! whatever, it's not my fault that this song is basically the perfect pop nugget and sounds like a choir of angels serenading you on a mountain made of gumdrops and skittles.

2. walk off the earth - "red hands"



basically just in love with WOTE and everything they do. from the lady of the band, sarah, helping my friend and i get into their sold-out show last year, to lead singer gianni complimenting my blog post about said show, these guys are not only super-talented, they're super-sweet, too. of course, there's also the incredible one-take video for this song that still blows my mind.

1. kurt vile - "never run away"



I. LOVE. THIS. SONG. there really wasn't any hesitation about choosing this as my #1 when making this list, and my spotify year-end thing confirmed that, in fact, mr. vile was my most-listened-to artist. from the yearning chorus to the "hey hey hey hey hey hey maaaan" and lush instrumental, it's basically perfect. he made a legit video for it, but i much prefer this one due to his intense leg-crossing, awkward air guitar motions, and adoooorable daughter.

death to the slow fade!

gather 'round, kids! today, we're going to talk about some awful phenomena that seem to pervade today's dating culture: "ghosting" and its evil, heinous twin, the "slow fade."

first, let's look at what we're dealing with here. urban dictionary defines "ghosting" as the act of suddenly ceasing all communication with someone the subject is dating, but no longer wishes to date. while the "slow fade" is when someone is lacking in readiness, or willingness to accept a budding relationship and therefore institutes this passive aggressive method of disappearing from a relationship altogether over an extended period of time.

i think it's important to note that in cases where you go on one date with someone and neither of you reach out, that's not ghosting. neither is a hookup where you both agree that this is just a solitary occurrence. but after you've been out a couple times (or have been dating for weeks or months) and CERTAINLY after you've acquired carnal knowledge of this person, vanishing into the night just makes you look like a douchecanoe. really, it does. come onnnn, bro.




(this one goes out to the ghosted gals out there.)


yes, i've been ghosted, and yes, i've been slow-faded. make no mistake, both are absolutely despicable behaviors, and can make even the most confident girl go completely britney-in-2007 cray-cray and want to throw her phone into the ocean. it's really not pretty, but slow-fading is truly the worst of the worst. instead of being ignored completely, you get occasional, teeny-tiny breadcrumbs from the other person that make you feel like you could be overreacting. "maybe they really are just busy!" you think. "i mean, they DID say they wanted to get together, but we didn't talk about specifics ... maybe i'll hear from him tonight!" you think. and then, you snap out of it and your rational brain goes "bitch, get real! he hasn't even liked any of your instagram photos in 3 weeks."

i don't care where you're from, or how you were raised. in no universe should it be acceptable to let another human being -- one you have presumably spent an enjoyable period of time with AND have probably seen nekkid -- just disappear from view, like a TV show you got sick of watching and decided to abandon halfway through the season. grow a pair, put on your big boy pants, and just holla at yo' girl to let her know that you don't wanna holla at her no more, okay? you don't even have to call! and i'm guessing you're probably not the "phone call type" if you're pulling these shenanigans to begin with. regardless, a simple text that says "hey, not feeling this anymore, but i hope you find someone great" will do. you don't have to explain why. and if the other party presses, just make something up if you don't want to get into it. i guarantee that a white lie will go over much better than silence ... or a lame text response that comes a week later. why even bother, y'know? 

while reading up on this stuff on the interwebs (LOTS of interesting articles -- every word of this was my life at one point), i also came across a concept called passionate detachment. yeah, it was invented by one of those so-called dating coaches, but i can't deny that it's a great idea, and a simple one. "you are passionately open to all dating possibilities, but you’re not attached to any outcome. you don’t expect anything of your partner, and you allow your relationship to unfold naturally and at its own pace, without pushing any kind of agenda." i like the sound of that, especially when a dude could so easily disappear at a moment's notice. easier said than done, though, right?

so, while being all passionately detached, i will continue to call out the ghosts and slow faders of the world for their offenses and kindly let them know that they're being dicks. what happens beyond that, i can't control. it's probably too presumptuous to think that i've saved their next not-so-lucky lady from the agony of queasy feelings, overanalyzing, and self-doubt.

but hey, a girl can dream! 

5 things i love right now

1. this adorable dog, floppy bear

when i thought that dogs didn't get any more adorable than boo, i was so wrong. meet floppy bear, the cute-as-a-button samoyed with a terrible name that has improved my instagram feed by at least 150% this week. doesn't hurt that shaun white's apparently a fan, too.

2. mat devine doing dramatic readings of stuff

i've written about the multi-talented mr. devine's blog posts before, but i recently discovered that he also does deadpan youtube readings of various things, from restaurant menus to hip-hop songs. my personal favorite is one of the latter: "buy you a drink" by t-pain. pure gold; there are few things better than a pasty white musician saying "damn, shawty."



3. this twitter account, @raplikelilwayne

why didn't i think of this? you see, weezy follows a pretty simple formula for his lyrics. someone has capitalized on this, and it's the gift that keeps on giving:

"Stole a fat guy's wallet, call that Robin Thicke"
"Answer no on a test, call it Quiznos"
"Pushed Tyra Banks down a hill, call that a role model"
"Took my old girlfriend out to dinner, call that Fed-Ex"

4. kitschy movie stuff from etsy

adding all of these to my christmas list right now.

dazed and confused

don't tell mom the babysitter's dead

empire records

5. amber riley's freestyle routine on the dancing with the stars finale

i don't watch DWTS, but my mom's obsessed, and made me watch this when i came home for thanksgiving. all i have to say is "YOU GO, GIRL." probably one of the best dance routines i've ever seen performed on TV. though i didn't follow this season, this performance alone convinced me that she deserved to win.

a recipe for the best cake in the whole friggin' world.

sorry to say, but i've been holding out on you guys. i actually have this recipe for the most delicious, out-of-control amazing cake you've ever tasted in your life. and i've had it for a couple years now. it's top-secret stuff, but i figured that i would share it since we're heading into the season of giving and goodwill and all that jazz.

okay, i'm totally kidding about it being top secret (i snagged this baby off of pinterest). i was NOT kidding, however, about it being the best cake on the planet. it takes some time to make, as all good things do, but OMG -- when you taste it, you'll understand and everything will make sense. oh, i should mention that it's a banana cake, in case you're allergic or hate bananas. whip it up next week for thanksgiving, or at any time for anything, and you'll be everyone's new favorite person. swear. 

CAKE: 

3/4 cup butter
2 1/8 cups white sugar
3 eggs
2 teaspoons vanilla extract
3 cups all-purpose flour
1 1/2 teaspoons baking soda
1/4 teaspoon salt
1 1/2 cups buttermilk

2 teaspoons lemon juice
1 1/2 cups mashed bananas

FROSTING:

1/2 cup butter, softened
1 (8 ounce) package cream cheese,
softened
3 1/2 cups confectioners' sugar
1 teaspoon vanilla extract

DIRECTIONS:

1. Preheat oven to 275 degrees F (135 degrees C). Grease and flour a 9x13 inch pan. In a small bowl, mix mashed bananas with lemon juice, set aside. In a medium bowl, mix flour, baking soda and salt. Set aside.
2. In a large bowl, cream 3/4 cup butter and 2 1/8 cups sugar until light and fluffy. Beat in the eggs one at a time, then stir in 2 teaspoons vanilla. Beat in the flour mixture alternately with the buttermilk. Stir in banana mixture. Pour batter into prepared pan.
3. Bake in preheated oven for 1 hour, or until a toothpick inserted into the center of the cake comes out clean. Remove from oven and place directly into freezer for 45 minutes. This will make the cake very moist. (DON'T SKIP THIS STEP!)
4. For the frosting: In a large bowl, cream 1/2 cup butter and cream cheese until smooth. Beat in 1 teaspoon vanilla. Add confectioners sugar and beat on low speed until combined, then on high until frosting is smooth. Spread on cooled cake.

enjoy!

sunday funnies

i've been on a youtube comedy binge this week for some reason, so i decided to rediscover some of my favorite clips. i pretty much just wanted to post all of qaadir howard's videos because i have tears streaming down my face during every one, but the powers that be at youtube won't let me embed them. here are the rest of my favorites!


chris d'elia

chris d'elia's vine videos are great, but his stand-up is also hilarious. the fact that this bit has to do with drake makes it even better. actually, the fact that he laughs like a hyena at his own jokes as he improvs is probably the best part.


sinbad 

my old roommate texted me the other day to tell me that "first kid" was on and she thought of me. this is because of my unwavering and random love for sinbad. but seriously, the dude is SO FUNNY and underrated. my dad and i used to watch his "afros and bellbottoms" HBO special on sundays when i was in high school and laugh 'til our stomachs hurt, and i ended up buying him tickets a few christmases ago to go see him live. he's just as funny like 20 years later.

jared logan


you may have seen this guy on "best week ever" or "last comic standing." he has a great style, and just seems like a cool dude. i keep coming back to this clip in particular, even though he hates on oprah in it. 

ye olde halloween

halloween is actually my 2nd favorite holiday, right behind thanksgiving. it involves food (well, candy, which is the best food), fun costumes, and a little bit of scariness. every year, i get a bit nostalgic for the old days of trick-or-treating and coming home to sort through my loot while watching some spooky movie or tv show. below are just a handful of random things that come to mind when i think about the scariest day of the year during my childhood. what are your favorite halloween memories?

still scares the crap out of me:



a fine, fun movie:

the trick or treat accessory with the most swag:

the worst halloween candy:

the best halloween special:

FALL BEVERAGE THROWDOWN

it's that time of the year when at least half of my daily calories come from whipped cream and flavored syrups. while many coffee establishments have their own signature drinks, starbucks definitely has the most memorable and distinctive ones. of course, i've tried them all. and of course, i had to officially rank 'em.

4. chocolate chai latte

ordered this new lil' offering a few weeks ago, and MY GOD WAS IT DISGUSTING. i should have changed my order when i saw the bumbling old barista ask another employee how to make it, so i guess it probably wasn't concocted correctly, but still. tasted like a whole truckload of chai concentrate was just dumped in there with about a tablespoon of hot chocolate mix. it was actually spicy. um, what? just...no.

3. pumpkin spice latte

probably going to get hate mail for this one, but it's overrated and just not that good -- sorry not sorry. i've realized that i definitely like pumpkin better in theory than in food or beverage, but i like me some pumpkin pie, pumpkin spice coffee, etc., etc. the latte is okay, but there is definitely such a thing as too much pumpkin flavor, and i've experienced it far too many times to take the risk.

p.s. i seriously love how mcdonald's is just totally stealing starbucks' shine and jumping into the pumpkin spice latte game. not even changing the name. gangsta.

2. caramel apple spice

a solid choice, which i actually happen to be drinking right now. like, let's get real, it's basically just apple cider with a caramel drizzle and whipped cream if you're feeling suuuper cozy, but it's quite delicious, and satisfies all of my fall-lovin' cravings. y'know what i mean?

1. salted caramel mocha

the salt. the sweet. the chocolate. the caaaaaramel. if i was charged to invent a delicious cold-weather beverage, this would be it. i usually get ambitious with a grande and then feel like i'm gonna vom/fall into a sugar coma by the end of it, but it's so, so worth it. i know salted caramel is super trendy right now or whatever, but that doesn't mean it's not amazing.

what are your favorite autumnal drinks?

unique new york

last night, i returned from a weekend trip to new york city...as always, it was a blast. i hadn't been in approximately 3 years, which is WAY too long considering that like 75% of my friends live there. so, a few months ago when my good friend gleni asked me to be her friend-date to a superchunk show in september, i figured it was a fantastic excuse to make my way back to NYC. highlights & pictures below!

immediately upon my arrival, i navigated the subway with a nice british woman who was on my boltbus from boston, and met up with my loooongtime friend jacob (seriously, kickin' it since sixth grade). as an appropriate first stop, we grabbed some hipster lattes and macchiatos at gorilla coffee in park slope and i felt really uncool.

after a brisket and potato salad dinner at dale talde's brooklyn BBQ joint pork slope, i enjoyed some whiskey sours and manned the jukebox with gleni at this great little bar next door called the high dive. they had all these homemade mixes, so my selections included urge overkill's "sister havana," brian jonestown massacre's "vacuum boots," and the replacements' "bastards of young." nailed it, even if we were the only ones paying attention.

on saturday, i had a mini-reunion and mega-ramen at momofuku noodle bar in the east village, with three of my friends from marist. pork buns and spicy miso ramen 'til i die, basically. it was lovely to see everyone, and the food was delicious! 

after lunch, gleni and i strolled through washington square park, where we saw a rainbow (top of the post), and this really cool dude who was entertaining passersby with marionettes he had made. in the second picture, the woman standing with him is his inspiration for the marionette! it was awesome and uniquely new york. 

then, we strolled through the west village and went to the big gay ice cream shop, which really needs no explanation. i got the "bea arthur," and gleni got the "salty pimp." solid.

we pressed on to the DUMBO art festival (that stands for down under the manhattan bridge overpass and has nothing to do with the disney elephant). it was a gorgeous day, and there were some really cool pieces!

before we headed to the show that night, we refueled with some kiiiller iced coffee at caffe vita on the lower east side. we were in search of a bite to eat (which ended up being this incredible sesame pancake with peking duck at vanessa's dumpling house) when i saw the sign below and just had to take a picture.

while i was trying unsuccessfully to get a good shot, this kid comes up to me and asks if i would take a picture with him. i did it, asking if it was for a dare or something. 

"sort of," he says. "are you in college?"

i laugh. "no! i'm old." 

"you don't look old!"

he comes back a minute later with his little posse, asking if i'll do him a big favor. 

"will you give me a kiss on the cheek?"

"it's for a skateboarding video!" his long-haired friend pipes up.

clearly, i HAD to do it at this point, right?

beaming, he walks triumphantly away, yelling, "you made my night! NEW YORK, baby!"

i'm so glad i could make this young man's cougar dreams come true, but i just know this photo is going to resurface someday. or next week. 

finally, the original purpose of this weekend...SUPERCHUNK! i had seen these guys before a few years ago, and once again, they did not disappoint.

the best part of superchunk shows is that the audience is literally all 40-something dudes trying to relive their early '90s glory days. i don't really know why. ladies, superchunk is great! listen to them. anyways, there is never a line for the women's room, and most of the guys are all married 'n junk so the creep factor is minimal. but seriously, you haven't lived 'til you've shouted along to "slack MFer" with a bunch of balding, middle-aged men. you just haven't. there were, however, 3 women in their late 30s in front of us having the BEST time, and gleni and i immediately saw ourselves in 10 years.

eleanor friedberger from the fiery furnaces came out to sing a few tunes, and i think there were 2 encores. it was crazy and fun.

we stopped for a nightcap on the way home at this laid-back bar called the magician, which had a great vibe. one of my favorite things about new york is that i can never see it all when i visit. i'll be baaaack!

5 things i love: cover songs edition

i was listening to #1 on the list below the other day, and got to thinking about how many random covers i have in my itunes. some are better than others, but i'm certainly not a cover song snob. this is pretty much the most random list ever, so fair warning. what are your favorite cover tunes?

in no particular order:

1. the vines - "ms. jackson" (outkast cover)

ok, i know i said no particular order, but this may actually be my favorite ever. they somehow turned a funky hip-hop tune into a stoner slow-jam. LOVE.

2.  no use for a name - "turning japanese" (the vapors cover)

i actually had this version of the '80s classic in my itunes foreva-eva as being by MxPx, until i realized the error of my ways like, last year. not that y'all care. is it sacrilege to say that i like this better than the original? 

3. better than ezra - "laid" (james cover)

i swear that kevin griffin is probably the only person who can do that falsetto justice. awesome.

4. rooney - "here today, gone tomorrow" (ramones cover)

love me some ramones, but another one that's better than the original IMO. i also have a lot of nostalgic attachment to this one since i pretty much listened to it 24/7 during the winter of my senior year of high school. le sigh. ignore the random weird notebook scenes in this video, it's the only one i could find.

5. my gay uncle - "back that thang up" (juvenile cover)

does ANYONE else remember these guys (and girl), from this random cover band competition that mtv had in like, 2000ish? it was love at first sight/listen, and i played the hell out of this super-crappy demo version (and probably the only version). but i still get so happy every time it starts playing because there is some solid, raw white boy rapping going on here. apparently, i'm not alone: one youtube comment reads: "JYEAH!!!! Best cover ever? Perhaps." somewhere, juvenile is smiling.

virtual housewarming party!

after just about 2 months and lots of comcast and couch drama, i'm FINALLY all settled into my new home, and i had some friends over this past weekend to celebrate! i'm pretty proud of my new abode, since it's the first place that i've completely been able to decorate exactly as i'd like. i thought i'd give y'all a peek. so queue up this spotify playlist, pour yourself a glass of wine, and have a look around!

living room! 

yes, i bought a bird lamp ... because i could.

bought this beacon street print at the sowa open market a few months before i moved to FL. still love it!

antique "kitchen" table & chairs!

(it says "delighted you're here")

the tree was entirely a project (lots of decals), but i think it came out pretty nicely, right?

lovers tarot print that i got at an art fair in orlando

the kitchen is always so sunny & i love it!

with the garland lit, at night

i also bought a bunch of stupid shit i didn't need, like this fake spice thing.

and this old mailbox, where i keep coupons.

the bathroom's a little dated, but i like it just fine.

and finally ... what 20-something girl DOESN'T have a decoupaged print of kurt cobain on her wall, amiright?!

what's on your happy list?

i've read about this idea before (namely in this fabulous xojane article), but the other day, i saw another piece that suggested everyone come up with at least 10 things that automatically make them smile or feel comforted and happy. you know, like a go-to smile file for moments when you're kind of bummed out or just want to feel happier.

after a particularly grueling commute this morning and an uncharacteristically grumpy mood this week, i thought it would be the perfect opportunity to make my list. i'm sure there are thousands and thousands i could add, but i'll stick with 20 for now. PLEASE leave your lists in the comments! i was having so much fun quizzing my friends about this earlier, and it's so cool to see what makes everyone happy.

a cup of dunkin' donuts coffee.
new england (especially boston) in the summertime. 
driving on a sunny day with the windows down and my favorite music playing.
men with southern accents.
chicken piccata.
hanson. (come at me!)
hip-hop dancing.
nice, france. 
baking a cake from scratch.
synchronicities.
vacation anticipation.
foodgasms.
finding my new favorite song and listening to it on repeat.
cinnabon smell at the mall.
sister act 2/the princess diaries/cheesy rom-coms/vh1 countdown shows.
smiles from cute strangers.
sinbad.
waking up and realizing i don't have anywhere to be (formerly SNOW DAY FEELING).
chocolate-covered gummy bears.
having the perfect buzz at a great concert.

the past few weeks in food

i was originally going to do a mega-post about all of these recent happenings, but i decided that since most of them involved food (with the exception of the rob sheffield karaoke party last weekend), i'd focus on that!


clam chowder - saloon, somerville ma

i stopped in here a few weeks ago for an after-work drink with my old neighbor, nicole. the place is a modern speakeasy, and embarrassingly hard to find -- at least for me -- as the only sign is a small lamp, wayyyy up high on the side of the building. once i made my way through the dark doors and down into the basement, i was  digging the vibe. after my frisco sour (well-made and potent), i decided that i was in the mood for a bite. they have a limited food menu, but the clam chowder was rich, creamy, and perfect. and how cute are those dang potatoes?!

PEI mussels, braised short rib, and concord grape gelato - upstairs on the square, cambridge ma

i went here with a friend for restaurant week, and was certainly not disappointed in the food nor the decor. it looked like an alice in wonderland acid trip, as you can see from the picture of the wall that i snapped. this was one of many zebras prancing alongside us as we dined. anywho, the mussels and short rib were awesome, but i really just want to talk about this gelato. sorry, it was too dark to fully capture its deliciousness, but they put one of those vanilla pizzelle things in it and some peanut butter on the bottom of the bowl and it was like a gourmet, deconstructed PB & J. whoa.

chicken enchiladas - la casa de pedro, watertown ma

i've been on many a patio this summer, and this one takes the cake. my friend and former roommate, kari, is moving this week, so we decided to meet up here and have some sangria and yummy latin food. i always order chicken enchiladas anywhere, but these ones were especially fabulous. and they came with fried plaintains and yucca. hello! but seriously, the patio. you would never believe it was in the middle of an office park!

salad with crabmeat, avocado, heirloom tomatoes, capers & asparagus - rowes wharf sea grille, boston 

my dear mom came down to visit last weekend, and joined me for my absolute favorite summer activity in boston - movies by moonlight at the harbor hotel. i think it actually may be called something different now but SO WHAT, WHO CARES. it'll always be movies by moonlight to me. basically, you show up super early to score a seat on their terrace, and then you eat and drink and chat until dusk. then, they show a classic/old movie on their inflatable screen, with the ocean as the background. it don't get better than that. anyways, after the meals of the week, i wanted to get something on the lighter side, and opted for the house entree salad. it was surprisingly filling and tasty, especially when i threw some of the leftover guac from our appetizer in there. probably ate the equivalent of 2 avocados. i don't hate it!